Finished Folds (1401—1420)
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2I'd agreed to give up my independence to be a part of the historic Human Supercomputer project. Our brains were linked together in series and questions were fed into our cortex.
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4hemisphere when a critical mass of people actually felt both the sun and the rain. And I mean actually *felt* them, not just got wet or burnt. What about you? Have you ever
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5until the Yellowstone caldera erupted and blocked out the sun to introduce their toddler-sized My Little Generator powered by treadmill, stationary cycle, or hand crank!
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3hopping a freight car with my trusty dog Payback. She was a tempermental beast, prone to biting those she mated with. We'd been on the run together for 'nigh on 3 years now and
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4had her way with me more than once by the fire. "Oh just sit down on my edge. Just for a second. Just to see what it feels like." 12 hours later I woke up with a neck crick that
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3one of her special tacos where the shell was made out of Doritos. I told my friend who worked at Taco Bell and they wisked Phatty McButterpants and I away. We were orally pleasured
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4One Very Fine Day a Very Freaky Dude rolled a Very Full Doobie. The Virginia Fire Department responded to a Voluminous Fire Debacle when the Dude's Doobie Volatilized For Days.
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6of his life. The perfect balance between plausible deniability and factual happenstance. Dr. N-J would need corroboration from E. Nigma on Miss Turie's results though. Telekenesis
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4blasted the shit out of every last one of those motherfuckers. It was as if the heavens above hailed gunfire out of his hands. Revenge was righteous and complete. La Cucaracha coul
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5something special by way of trade. A promise of services to be determined. A blank nonmonetary check. I relinquished four dolls and three rumors and secured my path to a soul.
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5He seemed to spiral the entire field and never did step on a mine. I walked up. "Huh. I was sure..." I heard a click under my left boot and froze. He smiled at me
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3with a tiny leak in my waterbed that recreated the primordial soup of genesis. A spark of static from a bunny slipper against the metal bed frame was the catalyst that brought
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3how I really spent those eight years. By God, I slayed more tail in that oval office than a sous chef at Red Lobster. Anyhoo, how are things for you dear? Hello? Chelsea?"
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9"Yeah!" we all said, thinking the Governor was batshit looney tunes. "What about we get a chicken, a pig, a cow and a fish and they duke it out at our table. Losers get eaten, the
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6Friends... family... countrymen. It is a far greater fold that I feld today than have I ever folded before. With these words
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5It took eight painfully written journals, $12,000+ in therapist bills, countless tears, and two mental breakdowns to figure out that's where it all started. 5th Grade.
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2They sodomized an angel. "Ooh" I cringed "Oops". "What is the safety word?" they repeated. Now I was sweating. "Uhhhmmm" What the hell was it?! "Erect broccoli?"
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3Steve Jobs^18 high-fived space leprechauns and mated with solar flares after snorting ground unicorn horn. He arm wrestled Zeus and barbequed with Satan. His powers grew until
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4dangle 40 berries from the dingle bush in front of the Director's nose just to lock down this part. Sometimes I surprise even myself.
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2an illusion that can be bent to meet the will of the enlightened. I sipped my colada and tried to act surprised when the croc clamped down on your femur in slow-motion. Cheesecake