Finished Folds (201—220)
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4And that's when it hit me- "All of these statues have penises...except this one!" I went over there to examine it more closely.
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2"Am I dead?" I wondered. The light at the end of the tunnel I was always told about was nowhere to be seen. I just floated gracefully until I ran into what appeared to be
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1It was something about zippers that always confused me- this was a trait that became especially apparent whenever I had a lady friend over. Everything would be going well until
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2I had no reason to disbelieve the Kings of Leon, but I had to know- was the sex REALLY "on fire"? To get to the bottom of this conundrum, I called up my good friend
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3"How could she forget I was allergic to shellfish?" I thought- face swollen by the poisonous hors d'œuvres. "Is she TRYING to kill me?" And that's when I felt something poking
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2"Fuck." He replied, saddened by the discovery. "Without those pictures we'll never be able to topple our shadow government oppressors." He sat despondently on a nearby bench.
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3"I have herpes."
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1There's nothing wrong with being gay, sure, but Neal Hardon took it to the extreme. The fanny pack and the roller blades were enough- the Enrique Iglesias CD was a tad overboard.
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1"I agree! She was bad enough on earth but now I gotta deal with her 'devout catholic' ass!" shouted Jesus. I felt bad for the guy, but I had a body to hide- I grabbed the nearest
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3mustard seed - that was the spice that killed my first marriage. She was almost as bitter as the irony, but I didn't mind. She was a bitch, and I got the house. "Who wants to eat
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1He couldn't believe it - all those years of training and preparation, and he was defeated by some no-namer from Minneapolis? Somewhere in the distance, Rick Astley could be heard.
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4I never was good at skateboarding. I think it was the jeans, honestly. How am I expected to kickflip with the maneuverability of a hogtied tortoise?
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0So there I was, sitting in a dimly lit room with my hands cuffed behind a chair. They finally got me. The voice of Detective Leonard McGee could be heard from the intercom system -
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2I was sitting on the couch with Shania, watching reruns of "Unwrapped" and playing footsies, when she looked into my eyes and said, "Wanna play the Wii?" That's when I knew
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8Kimberley Stockholm was a goddess - she had legs that were a mile long, teeth that you could see your reflection in, and hips
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6It's not every day you meet someone else with the same fetish for breakfast food. Call me a romantic, but at that moment in my life I wanted nothing more than to
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1"Cheese", we simultaneously chirped, happily getting a picture taken in the foreground of a cardboard heart. This fondue joint cost way more then it should, but it was a holiday-
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3"This'll be the best thing since sliced bread!" Captain Harvey Henderson shouted, dancing and waving around his newly invented
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1forgetting to knock on wood, Ralph unknowing released a proverbial shit-storm on his small island village of Tiki Harumbi. The first pie fell only minutes later,
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1twenty-seven wild howler monkeys with wonderful dentistry start running amok in the streets of Chicago! Animal control would be far too distracted to notice the missing