2 Folds
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it seemed pretty unlikely. I struggled to unshackle myself from the chains holding me to my cot, trying to push out any unwanted thoughts about my 16-year-old sexual drought, and -
3
but I wasnt sure if it was ready. I mean, theres plenty of Judge Judy fanfiction, but mine was JUICY. See, there's this one scene with Judy in the bathroom, and she's taking a HUGE
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4
to my orange tabby, who simply says "It's 2016, man. Open your eyes and thrust open the doors of perception," and I remember this whole story was one big LSD trip all along.
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All of this repeated cyclically for the next few decades before everyone moved on and eventually died, remembering fondly the days when they'd get drunk as fuck and smoke drugs.
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a puddle of gasoline dripping from the back of the malfunctioning ice cream truck. I sued, made millions, bought a house in Cuba and even bought a prosthetic leg for my Shih Tzu!
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Jurassic Park? Because I don't recall there being dinosaurs in the script..." he said to the director, the T-Rex towering over him - but the director was gone. Was he dreaming?
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1
d in the untimely death of the small creature by complete, ironic accident. Tom stood bewildered. He could only muster up a point of his finger to Jerry and a defeated "good one."
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of course, as many Magic the Gathering cards as we could possibly stuff in our trousers. This journey was to be a long one, and a bit of magic would suffice in giving us hope.
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coathanger, then turned back to the crazy cat lady. He sniffed for a second which felt like an hour, then slapped his hand violently across her cheek. "Don't ever call me a whore."
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3
He thought to himself briefly, then nodded, with a slight contour of a grin. "Life is but a dream." He kicked the rowboat off from the dock, slowly drifting into the night.
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2
It was about this moment I realized how juvenile Pokemon battles are. Why don't I just kill them? So, I pulled out my glock, fired a bullet right in Pikachu's dome. Game over.
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the Nutella jar. "God damnit", Newton said, trying to open it. Nutella was an important ingredient in today's Alchemy experiment - He got it open, finishing the experiment, which
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0
overcome with pity for this fat man. "Look", I proposed, "You're too old for this, man. All the houses in a day?" And like that, I pushed him off the cliff. I am the new Santa.
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4
raised a hand to his followers. "Enough", bellowed the elderly, "For I am the holy Ancestor! Praise me, peasants!" The Nomads looked among themselves. This old man was a DICK. They
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5
decided to host the largest music festival this side of the Mississippi. Woodstock declared the name of the festival "Woodstock", much to Snoopy's dismay. Headlining acts included
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3
ttens, the mittens that had kept me warm throughout my childhood, were soaked in her blood. It felt like a page of my childhood has turned - and it showed in my mittens. The body
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2
quake in their boots. Creating this diorama would be iffy at best - even for a master jeweler - but "Battle of the Bulge" wouldn't construct itself. He went hard at work, smashing
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nd what about THIS?" M. Night, out of the blue, then proceeded to breakdance on a cardboard mat and throw it down. This was certainly a TWIST, and the poor actor simply watched,
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1
Strumming gracefully on his guitar controller, our hero Dan Burderblatt attempted to tackle the songs from the God Edition of Rock Band he created - but even for he, the songs were
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delicious. I'd always been a fan of pistacios, a trait I inherited from my roommate Frankie. Frankie was a hefty animal of a man, always sweating and scheming. He needed to die. I