Finished Folds (281—300)
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0What was odd was not the density, but the distinct taste of ham hock on my lips. I wandered the misty pre-dawn streets following my nose. A scent of pea soup drifted from a
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5"Welcome to the 'Clown Without Borders' Your tent is over there and you can inflate your balloon animals at the helium tanks." A tear ran down my grease paint. "Thanks, Bozo."
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4I live, I love, More Olives!" and then she would slump to the floor. My Aunt Valetta had a thing for dirty Martinis, or was that Dirty Martin? her favorite bartender. Exactly, she
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2"Go away!" hushed James Cuthbert, esq. to the pink giraffe hovering above the jury box. "Is something wrong?" inquired the judge. "No, m'lord." James' imaginary friend had often
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7I have billions of dollars, I am going to cure malaria. I have billions of dollars, I am going to run for president. I have billions of dollars, I am going to dress as a bat.
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4Next year was third grade and Miss Whitcomb would remain teaching second. He cut a big heart out of construction paper. This would show his true feelings.
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4. I signed on the dotted line. I would be the new top dancer in RKO's Broadway Melody of 1938. But "he" had other plans. He rapped on my dressing room door. "Listen here, Buster!"
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6person man. Hit on the head with a frying pan. Lives his life in a garbage can. Who came up with person man? Degraded man. Person man. Triangle man hates person man.
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4He wouldn't hurt anybody. He couldn't even kill a fly. Which made his job as a Hit Man tricky.
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0the Tasman Sea. Putting the shish-kabobs between his teeth, he leapt the fence and started swimming. The pack of dingos crashed through howling like wolves. "Keep orf me Barbie!"
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1Okay, here it goes. Wait! I'm not ready. (Line?) Where's my mark? (You know New York, you need New York.) Water, I need water! Towel! (do, re mi) Ah-Hem. "It was the best -" (damn)
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4Oh the goose and the geese, the moose and the meese, I am loose with the lease, I drink booze with the bees.
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3I then ate 1 piece of cake, 1 ice cream cone, 1 pickle, 1 slice of swiss cheese, 1 slice of salami, 1 lolipop, 1 piece of cherry pie, 1 sausage, 1 cupcake, and 1 slice of mellon.
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2The journeyman clapped my shoulder. "It takes skills to make stuff up by hand, lad." I apprenticed fabricating small white lies. Someday, like my dad, I will forge huge whoppers.
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4The next time I went, I smuggled my date in a trench coat. "Now, if you hide under the table, I can clean this place out on breadsticks and salad."
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1"Eyr patch be bothern' me matey." The Captain switched it to the other side and continued to chow down on his fruit loops. The first mate paused mid-milk pour, "Imposter?"
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1The gibbet was on the docks of Port-au-Prince. As a pirate, this was the worst. The governor's daughter seripticiously handed him a note through the bars. "Be ready at nightfall."
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1There was a slight trickle in the river. A naiad approached Arwen's raft. "Antonio couldn't make it, I'm Beth, how can I help you?" The ring wraiths encroached further.
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2Four, oh wait, does that include pets? I mean ten." "Actually, we..." "Hold on, CAN'T YOU SEE I'M ON THE PHONE! QUIT TEASING YOUR SISTER WITH THE PYTHON! now where were we?"
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5The orphans looked on as the head master and his cronies gobbled to the last drop of treacle pudding. He dabbed his gorged lips. "Thus ends my sermon. Now off with you!"