Finished Folds (3101—3120)
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4. They discovered they could take regular people, put them on a deserted island. Starve them. Have them beat each other in snarky bon mots and ratings would go through the roof.
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1He took all of his files and put them in a shredder. Hundreds of hopes and ambitions turned into confetti. He then took the basket to the roof and sprinkled the snow on the
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4Her personal trainer brought bread and water. "I see you've lost two dress sizes all ready." "Please let me out!" she pleaded. "You knew when you signed to 'Gulag Spa' we would
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4dinner echoed across the desert sand. Immediately, the robots lost all decorum and rushed the chow tent. "Ain't you boys done enough marching? I whipped up some ion flapjacks!"
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2a product of his father drunken bouts of haberdashery. He reminisced about waking him at noon, pleading for him to make a nifty panama so food would be on the table. His own style,
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4that all of furniture had been rearranged. In the back of his mind, he thought "amnesiac interior decoration." He knew he did it because "Remember" was stitched on a throw pillow.
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6He kept his eyes on the prize, just on top of the mantle. "Don't it make my brown eyes blue..." he thought that the song was fitting for the situation but maybe a bit too literal.
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3the bulging triceps of Popeye the Sailor. I would have to shanghai some drunken salt in the Opium district. With a few swift cuts the torso would fit perfectly with the rest of the
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5to the end of his days. Forty-five years later, breathing refined oxeygen in a nursing home, a black cat pounced across his bed. "I knew it!" he exclaimed and died.
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3I left on the next bus out of there. All I had in my pocket was a couple of dollars and a moldy potato. I decided then I could be a ventroloquist in Las Vagas or eat the potato.
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5. Then June, from HR, placed the sign-up sheet for the Spring potluck on the glass. The machine became sentient. It would seek revenge on those who never filled the toner. Soon,
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7In slow motion, I reached for the lump as he bit down. "Noooooooooo!" I mouthed in a baritone voice. The apple filling exploded and threw his body through the plate glass window.
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3I replied, "yes...no...no need to touch..and mauve." I flipped the cell off and turned to my partner. "It is getting harder to sell a bomb these days. Those terrorists are so
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2. I headed straight into a bar. It was tungsten steel and had been mounted at eye level. "Whose stupid idea was that?" The dead man grabbed my pants leg. It throat rasped, "Tag..."
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3ask her long rambling questions about "Whose the Boss?" Ms. Helmond finally agreed to the interview, but all of the questions were, "How cool was it to work with Terry Gilliham?"
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8s of his perception shattered. Reality was just a series of printed scraps of paper. People drove around in cardboard boxes. His office was a chalk-drawn square on the pavement. He
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5entrance in the faculty lounge. There, the teachers could sneak out for contraband guava fruit, kumquats, and three martini lunches. Cindy donned her black hoodie and snuck into
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4which wrapped around the Ferry Building clock. Its many eyes looked down on the screaming populance. Cthulhu muttered "Damn, overslept again. Should have been up eons ago."
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3the world's largest spinach can. I was on a Corvette quest for Americana. It started with the ball of twine in Minnesota and would end in Florida with the biggest
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3practicle jokes as a choice of weapons. Dropping the Bang-Bang gun, Ted pulled an obscenely large mallet from his dueling vest. His opponent defended with an ACME anvil. "Zoinks!"