Finished Folds (661—680)
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2for action. She was going to be bobbing for more than apples in a few minutes. She was going to bob for her life. Little did I know at the time, but
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4started humming John Mellencamp tunes to himself, not caring that 1) he was out of tune, or 2) that he was annoying anyone within ear shot. That's what it meant to have power and
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3monster in check. And that was the end of him. But it was not the end of his legacy, you see, for he had planned for such a demise so that
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2calling her "Connie" for short, aiming for the car and the boat it was hauling behind it. A mini-pleasure craft on wheels. Connie was stiff and unyielding as both approached her
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2punched him in the crotch - a shot that would be right at home on an episode of "America's Funniest Home Videos." But this was real life, so he
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1- gently removing the barnacles from Queen Elizabeth II. No, not the boat - the monarch. She's holding up quite well, considering, but her fossilization process is proceeding quite
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2Sorry, I breathed in a bug there. Nasty. Anyway, as I was saying, I
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2I turn to CNN. Anderson Cooper is just dreamy; he can "360°" me any day. I've never been attracted to a white-haired dude before, but there is always a
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3Sweet'N Low® brand sugar-free artificial sweetener - which sounds funny - but is quite painful as far as product placements go. But, the sweet aftertaste was not
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1They didn't have much use outside of collector circles - except for making a bouillon. Once, he tried stringing a few together to make an ad-hoc necklace for Mother's Day, but
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1play canasta with her girlfriends. It was a girls' night out night after all, and she had prior commitments. Except now, she had a free cheese tray to bring to the card game.
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6sued for mesothelioma - even though I didn't have it. The worst reaction I had was a temporary stain from the spilled juice that left my face as red as a baboon's butt for three
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3that meant I was struck deaf since those little buggers can't bark. That's what I get for watching back-to-back Soul Train marathons. I can't believe the last thing I heard was
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3were good at distracting the bridge troll while he sneaked across to escape Oakland. It wasn't often you could get by without having to pay toll to the troll. But this time, TexMex
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2and let them loose. The flying, hairy creatures terrified the crowd. Good thing he remembered to poke holes in the Tupperware lids earlier in the day or the bats would have died in
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1for the banquet table. Tuesdays were mashed potato nights and he was going to make the most of this all-you-can-eat offer since he was in an all-you-can-eat mood. He didn't notice
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4Strunk & White's "Elements of Style" book, which sat unread on the bookshelf. Basic spelling and grammar was not his strong suit - and he didn't care. That stuff's for elite
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1terry cloth tube tops. "That's classy," he thought to himself each time she did it. "She must shop at the fancy new Kmart out by the Interstate." He'd scratch himself, hoping she
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2didn't notice the dirty smudge it left above her smiling maw. She turned to the next with glee-filled eyes and
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1- worse yet - 90s chick flicks. They were drowning in bad Julia Roberts, Meg Ryan and Hugh Grant movies and crying for help as they were slowly crushed by the weight of mediocrity.