Finished Folds (101—120)
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3considering what Betsy's dad looked like wrapped, a sort of cross between young-Elvis & Oprah. But that stench, as if someone were deep-frying sneakers & rats, made everyone
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2for the fragrance of orange blossoms suddenly infusing the air. The old man lay dripping blood from both ends yet smiling serenely, as if this moment were the culmination of some
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2and from the looks of her, you'd have thought she knew about dinosaurs from first-hand experience. Mrs. Yeti's antiquity spooked Talia even more that her Tibetan habit of chewing
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3that equine twine as Hanji blew his snakecharming song on the pungi-- like a Bengali version of White Christmas. Up & up I climbed, away from the ravenous ghouls below, toward an
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5floating down a river of pus in a punctured inner-tube. But Scotty's not coming back from the dead any time soon. And Reicher? Some night when he's passed out drunk, I might just
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3"You' got Timmy skippin round like a goddam ballerina! How's he supposed to kick a goal when you got him pirouetting down the fu--" He would have finished his tirade had a
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2I'd never be that cruel to insects. The thought of innocent bugs stuck to the backsides of prostitutes breaks my heart. I opened the can of
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1regrets of middle age, this hunting in hindsight for meaning. A man must advance in wisdom, not just in years. And so I shall press forward, find my Neptunian consort, perhaps
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2shot George a look & threw herself into Tom's arms. "Oh Tommy," she cooed, "Louise just never liked jerky. But I do, Tommy. I adore a good jerk!" George coughed to keep from
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5"I'm over the colitis," I said, "but I had a nasty fall & broke my marimba." "Oh?" she said, "I didn't know you played an instrument." Nuts! I thought a marimba was a bone in your
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5Chilean atlas salesmen in our youth. They would enter our homes at night, inverting any maps on the walls & changing our globes from north to south. Is it any wonder we meander?
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7a sort of gameshow in which she, the contestant, would be twisted into various unladylike positions while he, the host, flirted with the audience, mouthing the right answers.
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1far more diabolical, but no less practical. The Nazi tape had been invented by Dr. Ulrich Zimmer, for giftwrapping prisoners prior to their presentation to the Uberschlumph's
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1the pink & baby blue swastikas she had painted on the gable doors was NOT the way her head-dwelling Amish craftsmen had intended them. Two of them, Samuel & Aidan, began prodding
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5His time had run out. But mine was just beginning. Ducking into the alley behind Mr. Chin's, I kissed the enchanted Rolex & slipped it on. Eternal life, Ha! Death takes a licking.
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3that emits a rubbery fart with each step. The DMV had become his second home, really. He had perfected the blend that made the morning brew the delight of his fellow workers. Not a
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3the wind began swirling a cloud of Mardi Gras debris around his careening cycle. Beads and bras and bits of colorful trash thrashed his flesh and stained his helmet. Fortunately
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5Cads are a dime a dozen, champ. If you really want to gall a shameless bastard like me, why don't you try a something more original? Say... 'amigo.'"
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5He would stand before the entire parish next Candlemas and produce the item that had caused the whole debacle: the lost Wisdom Tooth of St. Cookachoo the Outlandish.
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13I'd have to land this thing myself. Couldn't be much different than a car, really, with a couple of added dimensions. And I'd sat through enough air disaster movies in the 70's to