Finished Folds (381—400)
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5to be a bit eccentric and something unlikely to meet PETA approval. Instead, a committee of gorilla awareness volunteers decided to lure King Kong Jr. with bananas. Stay tuned!
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6. But you didn't understand--the knee to the family jewels had no affect on you, So, you picked up your ball, with your tail between someone else's legs, and went home. Two days
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4photos of Faye Wray and he. . .naked. . .on top of the Empire State Building. . .liberally at his admiring fans. Of course, the conservative right was appalled by it all. . .
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4But, fake famous people are kind and friendly, while real famous people are assholes. Like Rob Lowe. While working for LADWP, I arrived at Rob's house Mulholland and Laurel Canyon
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1"All right, all right, all right. I'm gonna run into one today. I ain't lying. I feel it in my bones, baby. Gonna give one a ride. . .deep. . .far into the October night!"
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513 1/2 % normal, which is much better than I was when I entered the asylum. Dr. Demented brought me--a natural born Misanthropist--into the Psycho No More Hospital and fed me to
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5crazy broads need to stop coming around here when da kid is working!" Tony, my boss, shouted. "And you..." he turned his attention to me. "You gotta pay for them sodas. I ain't run
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2Melissa's husband, Homer, unless he's drunk. Rule 43: Never place expired condoms in the tip jar at Sonny's Bar and Grill. Rule 44: Don't watch wrestling on your phone at church.
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4very, very red. . .there couldn't be anything redder, except, of course, his face when he walked in on Magilla naked (he, not Magilla)--who proceeded to post the photos online.
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5recounted to the Medical Review Board, "His tongue was three times the size of Gene Simmons' and shaped like a dreidel." The equally high panel of doctors laughed hysterically.
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3So there he firmly stood firm--not as firm as he stood back in the 70s, outside of Lorna Dugan's bedroom., but firm, still--enough to make the women near the hipster machine blush.
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7She didn't take mine. I was devastated. I offered her two bites from my Klondike bar, but she just sat there. . .wooden. . .as cold as day old pizza. I decided, then and there,
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10But even with tattoos galore/And perfume that reeks of dirty whore/My Mother loves me each day, more/With breasts complete down to the floor/
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3closed window, busting his pride and turning him into an orange turnip. We called him Mister Dumpf and took control of his billion-dollar empire. We bought books for the library!
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4transgendered kind of day in Green Bay, double U eye. And now I'm just another ordinary regular guy. I'm just a regular guy. I kissed my boobies goodbye. I'm just a regular guy. .
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3all the seeing-impaired elderly at the TDRH--Twelve Dreams Retirement Home. It was a Spirited crowd. . .Mr. Skin would have been proud.
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4my ability to remember what I was looking for. Soon after that, I forgot that I ever had anything to lose, which left me feeling a little reticent about talking about it. . .so I
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5he tried desperately to think who he should call--who he could trust to not turn him in to Animal Control, or not fill his leopard brain with a titanium bullet. He killed a woman
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5These questions, and more, will be answered in 331 days, 23 hours, 59 minutes and 57 seconds, when "Winos with Bums" starts its 17th and final season. See ya then. Adios mothers!
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2wondered aloud. "You're damn right I am!" Monty Hall shouted from across the bar. "I'm older than you! Better looking than you! I get laid more often than you!" Bob Barker laughed