Finished Folds (8001—8020)
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4The slave and his mistress had built a raft to float to freedom down the Mississippi. About a 1/2 hour on the ride they saw Huck Finn and his slave smoking pipes on the
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3And then Greg laughed in her face. So she blew her coach's whistle in his ear. "Ow, that really, really hurt." She blew it again and this time a Puerto Rican band came around the
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1But the was Peter Jackson great he wondered? I mean, what was with all the male-dominated crying in pubs and sappiness intervals in Lord of The Rings? That's it I'm fighting for
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0gorilla at the zoo. She sharpened her teeth on the bones. The next time that stupid intern came in to clean her "Cell" she would rip her spine out like pulling down a zipper. She
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1out of anger. She had hurt the elephant's feelings by not saying "Hello" when she had walked into the cage. She had things to do. She can't walk on egg shells just because the
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0The pet leech
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0A tree fell.
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1had been on the Cruise to Alaska with Great Uncle Sal who'd sent up to the room to get fishy snacks, Panama hats to keep from getting burned and an inflatable lounge chair but
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4cave wall. What kind of ancient civilization had been playing crossword puzzles in the caves of Antigua? Then the lights came on and the crew yelled, "Surprise!!! Happy Birthday,"
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3e totally pointless because I would wake up as myself. Crap. Loserville strikes again. Nothing works for me. I asked this girl out for a date and she turned out to be my sister.
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3Ted said, "Goodnight." Closed the door. Went to his closet and opened it. Red eyes gleamed in the dark. He shoved the coats aside. The vampire was bolted to the wall and hissed
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2She loved being in love. She loved it so much that she prepared for Valentine's Day ten years in advance. She didn't have a boyfriend yet but that didn't matter because she knew
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3He was a racist but he was also the pastor of an African American church. His whole existence was like a civil war. Two halves hating each other. How did a White Pastor become the
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1Dean Ackerman was head pollster for the Republicans. He's seen monsters but not like this. This was Caligula all over again. He wanted the numbers. So Dean lied and told him that
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6He sat down. Quietly. He read the barf bag. He'd felt a little jumpy and scanned the passengers coming on board. No body language cues. A ten year old said, "You're an Air Marshall
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0He'd flown to Arkansas before but not dressed like this. The lady in first class wouldn't even make eye contact with him. He had to ask twice to get a scotch. She brought Jack
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2He jumped onto the taxi cab's hood. The cabbie tried to smash his fingers by rolling up the window. He smeared his face against the windshield and screamed, "I looooooove you!"
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3He couched...right into the blowgun. Oh No!. The dart came out and hit Principle Lunderson in the neck. He whipped around and saw Blake standing there. "I coughed, it was an
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2He mesmerized her with his eyes. Her mouth slackened. His yellowish nails grew from his gnarled cuticles. He pulled at the air and she lifted up, the power dragged her to him where
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5He had cut off shorts, vans, an inner tube, a 12 pack of Pabst, no sun screen, Too Short box set and bologna sandwiches. He was ready for the river but when he got there