Finished Folds (8021—8040)
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3The space ship landed on top of the school. Jobe and Adam had snuck up there to smoke and drink beer. They woke up, saw the door open and inside the ship was Abraham Lincoln
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2Socrates got up. It was early and his toes were cold. He called his slave to bring some warm water. The slave came in. There was brown crap down the front of his tunic. Socrates
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5Hillary Clinton giggled, "Like this?" and the Greek club owner nodded. She threw a pink plate against the floor and it shattered. She slugged back Ouzo and ankle-smashed a plate
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3Dark nights. That's all the Legion of Doom had on the calendar. They had opted to save energy by going to bed early and using natural lights. Bizarro Superman hated this because
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5There is one story about the Buddha that not many people know. It was the time that Buddha appeared before the three stooges on the set of The Captain Hates the Sea. Curly was
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1She had come to the door and said, "Hi neighbor." In his mind he thought, "Drop dead loud mouth." But what he said was, "Hi." Then she handed him the sympathy card. He opened
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4Biden had been second fiddle long enough. The President wanted to play a little one on one? Then the VEEP was going to play by street rules. He was going swing his elbows
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0or suplex this asshole. She was the Queen of motherfucking England beyotch! You don't ask me what I'm thinking. Even if you are gay. I am a Royal and you are duck shit, so Queen
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2Just then Deanna, that chunky little freak came around the corner. She was in Wonder Woman costume. Her rolls screamed against the outfit. I saw the bat lying on the ground and
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1They scratched the brittle's surface, then smelled it. They mumbled to each other. They grabbed the smallest of their tribe. Made him bit the brittle. His teeth shattered like
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1Or what she thinks about me when we make loved on top of bacon and eggs. I like it sunny side up and I tickle her labia with crispy bacon strips. Then she jams the toast and butter
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2but the Angry Pirate was holding their legs under water. They could see his gold teeth and he grinned. Bubbles escaped as they screamed. The Angry Pirate brought out his hook and
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1when she had the clap. But this was something far worse. This was a tape worm that had gotten out of control. He forgot it was there and entered a hot dog eating contest. Now
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4and did the whole friends with benefits thing and never married any of them. It wasn't until he was 45 and tired that he thought about commitment. That's when he met Paris Hilton's
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2were so quiet that I couldn't hear them. I went for a magnifying glass but it wasn't there. My brother had it, he was burning ants. Then a giant ant crushed his head with mandibles
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2and of course Turner did his part by spitting, coughing and wheezing to spread HepC. Unfortunately, they were followed around by ten geeks armed with Lysol. It was an all out war
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0he raised his sword and said, "By the power of Gray Skull." and then like lightening rained down. And he burst out of his clothes, and was ripped. The cute cat became this green
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3and she ignored all of them. Instead she copied what everyone wrote, changed every other word and submitted it to the New Yorker's fiction department. She got a call from
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5Grape Ape please. He's ruining the alignment in my jeep every time he gets in. It's practically illegal anyways, I can't see behind me. I bought a gun and I am going to kill him,
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3thought some more. Then a strange thing happened-nothing. We thought about that until we had migraines. But still, nothing. Then I had an idea, and we brainstormed and then