Finished Folds (8541—8560)
-
4So I rolled grandma in her wheelchair real slow. She collided with the Good Humor bumper. The driver was drunk and didn't see her. She got stuck under the truck. She sparked
-
3So I took out the "razon sash" and said, "You are a beauty queen!" and whipped him in the face like a methed out monkey. I pulled his hair and said look at that,
-
0coffin that had been decorated like the ship from Peter Pan. Someone screamed, "Show your tits!" and hit him in the head with beads, and that really hurt. He took out his uzi
-
2the Circle K and ate a bunch of those cookies that 3 for 99 cents. The clerk chased us out with a pitbull because we tried to pay with Performance Art. Tom was
-
3they found out Jerry Springer had a special gift for them. He took them on his Yacht and opened the sea chest. He pulled out crazy straws in the shape of sunglasses and
-
2That was before we realized that what we thought was Germany was Romania. We are total Geography dunces. That was because we were traumatized by
-
2was at Mad Magazine in those days. We really thought that "Cracked" was going to overtake us. We had no idea that there was a double agent, taking our gags and
-
2Wilson started talking about suicide again, I laughed. I slapped him in his giant whittled wood nose and told him to give a rest. I have a dinner to prepare for 12 guests and
-
4put war paint on my face like a Shoshone. I road buck-naked into the Walmart on the back of a Grizzly Bear and demanded they stop selling any books authored by
-
3to play the Spice Girls. That level of pre-packaged, diagrammed pop music could cause brain blisters and skull shingles. But he couldn't help it. Scary Spice was so hot that
-
2the rope that Hanji had thrown up. He called it the Indian Rope trick. It was as stiff as a stallion's dick but it was attached to nothing. Hand over hand I pulled myself up
-
1elixir that the Warlock in Chicago made for him. It was past the expiration date but he drank it anyway and ate a stale bologna sandwich. While he waited a deaf beggar came
-
2real hair taken from Mexican Werewolf people. She had almost married one of them, but her furry fiancee couldn't read English and used her Hair Removal product instead of gel.
-
3the laundry in the dryer to freshen it up and put off having to fold. I could feel the gnat struggling in pools of wax in my ear canal. If only Victoria was here because then
-
1my beaded chode pulsed. It was my supervisor. The fact that the Institute installed the communication pod there meant that they lied about "all the research they did." It means
-
3mountain stream. He loved hunting hill billy's. He had mounted several heads of a families from the Smoky Mountains. He had never seen European hill billy's, he
-
2The training book contained a colossal myriad of warnings regarding the plastics and ink of the police tape. In fact it had been developed by the Nazi's for another purpose
-
6Instead they hyperventilated and then held is breath. The momentary high was worth the huffing and puffing. He learned it from his Boy Scout
-
8"That's what the carnival is for," Sparky mused. He could marry however many kids he wanted. He had fifty child spouses in Renton, Washington, but when you're master of the midway
-
3clean all the mayo off the gun. By then the little jerk would have his prints all over it. Now if he could just get him to wash the knife that was inside the caper jar, then he