Finished Folds (41—60)
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1A week after the 2022 midterms, Trump announced creation of MAFA Oreos (Make America Fat Again), with TRIPLE STUF orange filling. The Dems, strangely, liked them, and Chuck Schumer
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1dia dell’arte performance! I wanted to move to the Theatre of the Absurd: Pinter! Ionesco! Beckett! Trump! However, the best I could do was find a couple of grubby hand puppets and
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2as I search for a music maker that won’t cause me to hyperventilate whenever I play it. Suddenly…There it is! It’s boxy, it tunes easily, and it’s electrified. It’s an AM/FM RADIO!
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2got to stop him!” With that, Julia Child’s ghost sped to earth, wine bottle in hand. When she found the guy with his head in the oven, he turned to face the ghost and freaked. “You
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1On a bluff overlooking the stampede stood General Douglas MacLobster, puffing his corncob pipe. General MacLobster then dejectedly ordered “Retreat” but vowed, “I shall return."
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4boy chair, waiting. Just then Aunt Jemima, recently freed from the supermarket shelves to become a freelance assassin, snuck up behind Mrs. Butterworth and popped a cap in her ass.
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1But Atrax lumbered onward, mallet in hand. Suddenly, Marty rose and asked Atrax, “Ever notice Atrax spelled backwards is Xarta?” Dazed, Atrax pounded his own head with the mallet.
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3fortuitously, farting furiously on the far-flung furnishings. Just then, jokingly, Jerry and Jen journeyed in, jumping for joy and questioning the quorum, “Alliteration, anyone?"
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2throat. My girlfriend had hated the damsel ever since she caught her making goo-goo eyes at me. Secretly I freed the damsel myself. We ran off together & lived happily ever after.
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2y tiramisu disintegrated beneath my fork. The tiramisu rotting was like Poe’s “The Facts in the Case of M. Valdemar.” I was grossed out by rotting flesh—and tiramisu--and puked.
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1So his first question was…How’d Kurt Cobain do this? After all, HE was locked inside a heart-shaped box for weeks. He decided to ask Kurt but learned he’d died over 25 years ago.
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2picked up my shovel and joined the chain gang. Paul Newman was one of the gang and spoke some BS about “failure to conjugate,” but I saw nothing there related to verbs whatsoever.
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2a brown skid mark on the couch. Knowing the store’s slogan was, “You shit on it, you pay for it,” he tried desperately to elude the JC Penney manager, who was in hot pursuit.
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2he said to the cow. “Haven’t you any other pies?” he asked. “Pumpkin? Apple? Cherry? These cow pies are just…SHIT!” “That’s right,” said Ferdinand, “cow pies are made of cow shit."
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3was as blood-filled as a plasmapheresis center. Bradley literally drooled at the thought of sinking his fangs into her. But Pam was cagey and not anxious to be sucked dry. So she
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1when Alfred Hitchcock suddenly entered, in profile of course, in time with his theme music. He began his usual greeting: “Good eve-“ “Oh, SHUT UP!” interrupted Monique. “You’re so
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2ation sword, I couldn’t help but chuckle. “What’s funny about the sword?” my hubby wondered. “Gen. Pershing himself presented it to an officer!” “Woooo!” I went, and hubby fumed.
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3the heavens with an upward-thrust fist. This was rather high expectations for a photo of some African guy, but it persevered, achieving great renown and making quite a good living.
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2Speaking of waking up, you may never wake up AT ALL! Pluto’s got nothing on a poor slob who lies down for a nap and dies in his sleep. But, like Pluto, he’ll never pay taxes again!
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3the plane, and the pilot got sick of the kid noise and the depletion of the peanut supply. He dove the plane suddenly. The kids rolled toward the cockpit as he opened the bomb bay.