Finished Folds (101—120)
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2afterwards. I put the bloody axe in the hall, ringed by the four I’d butchered. The sheriff, ever a dolt, got on his radio: “Bring an ambulance. There’s been a terrible car wreck."
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3& believing & deceiving &…”HEY! I know you!” said the guy who had just walked in unnoticed. “That cadence! Those rhymes! You’re the Reverend Jesse Jackson, aren’t you?"
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4communicate? Greg and Tai found a way to do so and not break vows of silence inside the convent. It did, however, evacuate the convent and burn it down: They sent up smoke signals.
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3logging in was unsafe. A key was found, and we warily entered. What we saw inside would scare the shit out of Poe: The admin sat on the floor slobbering and folding…origami cranes!
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4“I gave him a GREAT tip,” she said. “I wrote on a piece of paper ‘Bet on Andy’s Dance to win in the 5th race at Aqueduct.’” But it was a bum steer: Andy’s Dance came in dead last.
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3atop a fire hydrant. Water sprayed all over. A guy walking by saw the ruined Chrysler Imperial. “WOW, Grandpa had one of these!” Queen Kong arrived to claim the thrown car, but the
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0five seconds after it was grilled. The villagers were still hungry. “More grilled swordfish!” they chanted. Seeing that no fish and almost no tartar sauce would incite a riot, she
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4ra played on, much like the orchestra did on deck as Titanic sank. Fate and déjà vu then raised their gnarly heads in unison, as Constitution Hall filled with water and then sank.
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2So everyone fucked off and walked. Thickened leg muscles began appearing everywhere. Pants began not to fit, leading to a shortage rivaling the toilet paper shortage during COVID.
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3He parted some high-grown weeds in the direction of the mewling and saw the cougar, rubbing a growing lump on its forehead. ”Great!” it said. “Another ass hat who can’t play golf!"
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4He trembled to think about the terrible price he would have to pay. “Wh-wh-what’s the price?” he stammered. “Ehhhh, gimme a dollar seventy-five. I’m running a special this month."
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5They looked about, puzzled. “Back inside, girls” said one. “We’re at the wrong spot!” “Just a minute,” said Wes. “What about the damage?” The lady inspected the sub. “What damage?"
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6took it to the bank. Opening the bank door, he cold-cocked a robber who was rushing out. Seymore got a $25,000 reward. The fake check? Dropped in the chaos & swept into the trash.
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1It was a bicycle with a playing card in the spokes. He felt like a jerk. Not for thinking a bicycle was a motorbike but because he never got the trick to work on his bike as a kid.
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4and Santa was sick of Rudolph’s drunken flirting with Mrs. Claus. He paid Comet $5000 to arrange a hit to bump Rudolph off. The plan got ditched after Gene Autry recorded the song.
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4I heard enough monikers. I left and came back with my largest cast-iron frying pan. I raised it. “Here’s the ‘Beat your head with a frying pan ME!’” I brought the pan down hard.
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2went to get his prescription. Once filled, he took a dose and swam off. Little did he realize he’d been given a laxative, and he began expelling liquid shit and polluting the sea.
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2Trouble was, Pyrrh really wanted a NEW recliner that held no father-fucking stigma and allowed him to park his hemorrhoids on. He found a great store to shop for one: La-Z-Rhoid.
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3saying, “I’m lost, where’s the Nautilus?” “Over there,” says the drunkest creature, pointing. The diver leaves, heading for the sunken Pequod. The creatures laugh their asses off.
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4crotch. “Elmo’s crotch feels good! Elmo likes—“ Swinging Elmo by his felt dick, the General threw him out a window, snarling. “I HATE idiots who refer to themselves in 3rd person!"