Finished Folds (201—220)
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1"Just one. Oh wait, that was already two. Fuck. Shit. Fuck!" This was met with raucous laughter, and ex-dictator knew he'd blown his one chance to say something truly funny.
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2Her thoughts were suddenly confirmed as a crack appeared in the tiles ahead of her. Smaug's massive tail lifted slowly through the floor of the nursing home, and barred her escape.
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5suddenly, I realized that everything leading up to this moment had been at the whim of a greater power. A power that now threatened to suffocate my mind with its irrational hate
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1Later that year, after having successfully extricated myself from the life-threatening situation, I sent a bushel of bananas to them. Too bad the orphans had never worked a day in
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2I replied, "Uuunngfh." because my mouth was full of caviar. Caviar I had purchased with the money I received from Mark Zuckerburg for blackmailing him with the photos I had taken.
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4they were smart birds. Not a single human being suspected the secret technology, but the birds knew they had to act soon or lose the element of surprise. Unlimited food was their
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3extremely dangerous so he'd have to be careful not to recite those particular verses. Unintended side effects of the new-found super power led him to recall Sir Mix-A-Lot silently
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3her mother, he realized he had gone a step past the line and knew what was coming. As the steel-tipped boot dislodged his scrotum and testicles, he prayed for death.
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5dreams. Every time I'm feeling down, I just pop one of these little zingers, I call them "olives" but they're actually horse tranquilizers, and ironically I get a massive erection.
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5go to waste. He called the big blind, and kept his face reserved as the first round of community cards were revealed. He again called, but after the fourth card, he went all in.
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6Those pathetic insects never see it coming. This was the third batch I'd trapped in my greasy hair, and they flitted around panicking and searching for an escape.
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3imbued with unique superpowers. Joey gained flight. Lucy could read minds. Poor Stacy, though, turned into a reasonable facsimile of THE INTERRO-GATOR, costume and all.
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3but lately his stories had started revolving around various sea mammals and gastropods doing nasty things to female divers and passersby. Ferdie's eight children ran the club well
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3Her best story detailed her exploits with the heavyset second-in-command of the group. While he was occupied with her snatch, she was snatching the bills from his wallet.
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1to the 3-inch tall fae woman tucked into my shirt pocket, as she was psychically linked by mistake to my hair and nails but not my living flesh. This caused me confusion, but I
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5In fact, so many eggs had been dropped on their mobile home that the farmer and his wife had to hunker down underneath the only solid piece of construction in the thing: the fridge
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2release the hounds, by merely twitching his left eyebrow in the direction of his intended victims: two middle-aged women who had apparently been listening to the whole thing.
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0her worst fear, or so she believed. Without her noticing or suspecting, her pursuers were moments from getting the drop on her! And then they did, and she died. Probably.
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1refuse them the quite life-critical assistance? I did not know, but for now they nibbled on some travel-size decorative easter eggs and sushi they kept on them at all times.
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3I couldn't reach for my boot-knife, but I spied across the room a glint of light reflecting from a sharp piece of glass wedged into the floorboards. I surreptitiously strained to