Finished Folds (901—920)
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4"I can do a flight that refuels 30,000 feet in the air at the circumcenter of the Bermuda Triangle if that's what it takes." "That IS what it takes." I soon met her mother in He
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5"Sorry babe, the Hamburglar stole the other McRibs." "I most certainly did NOT," said a voice from the bedroom. "Hamburglar, you're tearing us apart more than any pork sandwich!"
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4choose, Buddy my boy. You dyed your hair brown, then turquoise, and now lime green? It looks like Jackson Pollock barfed in our sink. Think of your roots." Moms sure are lame, huh?
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3Especially from the cafeteria food. My stomach could handle wooden desks, but the pizza left it growling in protest. I stroked my belly lovingly. "Make room for some chalk, m'kay?"
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3would take one of the stacking cups and hold it under the wound. My cup stacking coach thought I had to drink ALL the blood I saw, as if people eat ALL the food they see (they do).
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4that dating a pig was her worst life decision. "Hey Matilda, deary, (snort, snort), I think you'd look good wrapped in bacon. MY bacon." Ugh, again with the bacon jokes. His slaps
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7/ 365 days a February. "Of all the months to squeeze 365 days of folding into, why February?" they lamented. The camp kids met folding quotas with minimalism and copy-pasting from
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6ng with a voice drenched in blues and rail drink. One by one, the torturers of the world turned their TVs on. Here was Seamus, tugging their heartstrings as a quarterer tugs limbs
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7"'Buddy'? I'm no one's buddy, ma'am," said the officer. I, aghast, removed my wig and lipstick. "I'm no one's ma'am, sir, but I'll gladly be your man." "I don't date speeders."
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5and lack of soul-crushing dugout chants. He decided to pay attention to his kids for the first time in years in hopes of learning about 12-year-olds and baseball. The director
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9I'll never know. I'm not sure that I even know that I knew it. Can I know something if I don't know that I do, Mr. Squirrel?" The squirrel, with its lucky acorn lunch, became deaf
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3Rebellion? I go on a hunting trip for 5 hours, and they start a rebellion? Maybe this rabbit with an arrow in its head will placate the populace. Squire, fetch the royal megaphone.
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2win treatment for their rope-whipped shins. The Mexican Jumping Beans were the crowd favorite, but it was the Ho's who won over the judges. In protest, a Bean swung the jump rope
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3they preferred to eat each other in the darkness of their aquarium castle's. I showed the moonbeams to my friend, Lupus, who began howling and tearing off his clothes. I should've
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4and don't get him started on William Jennings Bryan's preference for silver. This leprechaun wasn't particularly charming, but he loved chasing our kids around as they taunted him.
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7time we play Eeny, Meeny, Miny, Moe, and I want to keep my winning streak alive. I also have a streak of being touched by every woman who knows my name. I usually grab her hand and
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2to ones that were brown when he bought them, and chastise his wife for her incontinental breakfast muffins. First things first, he had to drive home before a rash formed. Traffic
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3If you so much as anne frank a single Toner Pirate, consider yourselves unblessed, Kalamazoo County. Once I rid the world of Toner Pirates myself, we can rumble with the Ink Ninjas
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3Slayer album collection in the CD aisle. After snagging a few copies, the Angel of Death stalked Target's children's clothing dept. "Do you have older siblings?" it asked Billy.
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6and Swordfish Jarts, all productivity will be lost. Once we laxify their lifestyles, we can conquer them Eskimofolk." Mr. Perkins led the walk/charge, but the Eskimos' penguin ammo