Finished Folds (1901—1920)
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2so I jammed every jug of love juice into my jorts. But I figured the Spermbank tellers would notice if all their merch went missing, so I whipped out some empty jugs as well as my
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7s to little pigs and had a straw construction business? Grandma pointed out that even when he transformed from loping lupus to loving Larry, he still had those big teeth and
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3"Rehab," Amy replied. "No, Ms. Winehouse," said the raven. "This is the 27 Club. We have been expecting you." She entered the courtyard. "Come as you are, Amy," said Kurt Cobain.
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3jokes involving metaphorical comparisons to 747's and other large-tired, skid mark-leaving transports. Oddly, his girlfriend's skid marks were on the boob part of her lingerie.
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4Yo, doc, I hacked up a lung back in the womb." The newborn was talking, wheezing, and smoking through a little hole in his neck. The birthgoo put out his cigar so he searched for
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5as he moon walked to the kitchen to make Bubbles a banana daiquiri. "Besides," said the King of Pop, "everyone knows that you live forever in Neverland. I'll have enough time to s
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4Cran-Apple, dolphin excrement, and habanero pepper juice from concentrate into Arwin's creeper peepers. His eyes opened wider than the ones in Black Hole Sun until they finally
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4should start seeing other bison. I got that job in South Dakota posing for Native American commemorative coins. I'm going to meet a real-life Sacajawea impersonator! I hope you
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4thought that the Americans were pretending to be Japanese citizens as a result of losing a bet on the women's world cup. But Anjinsan discovered that Mr. Roboto was to blame for
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2in which Lady Gaga did a lot of "googoogaga-ing." And, eager to make a contribution to this American pop culture excesspool, Kesha went ape-slut in an incident involving apes and
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5terds. I used to eat junk, but thanks to this new kind of finger food (self-cannibalistically speaking), they look so organic. With my fingerless hands, I proudly point at them so
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2paying Terrence to coach my prize racehorse, Nay-sayer. It was Terrence's first non-human client, but he figured his tire-flipping workouts, whey protein shakes, and brutal insults
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3brocc-to-Doc ratio, and it's been a financial burden. Plus, my mad science caused catastrophic damage and odor in every room but my basement. So here I sit, surrounded by rat terds
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4that it got sliced off by a windmill blade on a putt-putt golf course. But I was so proud of my missing toe that I wore sandals 24/7. I called myself the "Nine-Toed Fox."
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4slew of names in the BlackHoleNamer Registry. Examples included "Vag," "Poop," and "Russell Brand." Long gone were the days of "Cygnus X-1." NASA gave me a call
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5-bath lifeguard with one head was my top priority. I typed into eHarmony "looking for unicranial saver of drowning birds to watch 30 Rock with, and to make my babies." Matches were
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3-holed Patrick Roy and the rest of the intergalactic space defense army. Then, Queen Formicon floated down to Earth on a giant gas bubble and laid a million eggs in my Amherst.
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3"Good morning, and welcome to GlOBE Otters, the world's first and only astral travel agency for otterkind. How may I help you?"
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5"I'm sorry, Mr. Johnson," said the government agent, "but I'm here to revoke your man card." Mr. Johnson's lip quivered. "But why?" he asked, as his mascara began to run.
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3showed up with their class rings from Mordor Preparatory School. "These gems came from the Mines of Moria," the Wraiths boasted. Overcome with envy, the ring collector drew his