Finished Folds (381—400)
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3She flew in on pixie dust on the arm of Peter Pan as Hook and his crew aimed the cannon straight at her heart on fire. TIK TOK (on the clock) but the party didn't stop, no...
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5domination. No surprise there. Using youtube and other modern conveniences, I got together some Tea Party Patriots to overthrow Obama by making his plans public to the nation and
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6when I refused to consummate our love, Mary Magdalene declared her undying devotion and asked me to marry her. My job required me to be single, but I appreciated the sentiment.
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5it wasn't as easy as it looks on TV. I ended up losing both arms due to Godzilla's teeth but at least I got a couple million dollars and a contract with ABC for the Bachelor show.
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2and put it to good use on the creators of Wow Wow Wubbzy so that it would never, ever come back to television and pollute the minds of children everywhere. My next mission was
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4But I had enough experience with women to know that when she said blueberries, she really meant rat poison. So after she'd gone, I fed the pancakes to her Rottweiler.
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6that Spot's master had thought he'd misplaced. But the evil mailman would never give up that easily. He returned the next day to deliver a package with a loaded Red Ryder BB Gun
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4n exorcist ASAP!" So Rightie shifted into overdrive and Leftie jerked the steering wheel so the vehicle turned around. "Check the GPS for the nearest exorcist," Teddyhead cried
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4"You were right, I was wrong. Mops are clearly superior to Swiffers," I gave in. Gleek gloated with pleasure for about five minutes before I punched him in the stomach
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2a lollipop, a stuffed panda, and a band-aid for the boo-boo. Later on, I would research the pros and cons of circumcision for my own son. I decided that, without a doubt,
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7shot up 240 feet in the air at 150 miles an hour. He held on to the metal bars for dear life. His butt slipped from the seat and the only thing keeping him on the coaster was his
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8what with blood pouring out of my head and all. This was a pretty good excuse to miss Ayala's Bat Mitzvah. Growing up primarily with Jewish kids, this would be about the millionth
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6"Now I'll just have to start all over again in my quest to find the man who killed my brother." There was a little diner on the corner and I could definitely use a bite to eat.
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5this was serious business. I really wanted to see my frienemy get decapitated at the guillotine and I wasn't getting there with my foot stuck in the bear trap. I had a pocket knife
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4Unfortunately, the only thing that came to mind was "au revoir." She began to walk away, disappointed and confused. "No! No! Bonjour! Please come back!" My hands were sweaty and I
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8Mom was dead. I couldn't believe it. I wish I never
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1This is the saddest story you will ever hear in your life. It all started when
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2Well, I don't feel like going into it but if you really must know, it happened on one of those kind of Mondays when you have to drag yourself out of bed. The alarm clock
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6"Do you need love love advice? Then call Miss Cleo's Psychic Phone Line right now. For only 99 cents a minute, you can have your future told." Sammi rushed to the phone and dialed
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15"List of Things I Have to Do Today" 1. Scrub the toilet 2. Do my laundry 3. Walk Fido 4. Find out what I have in the refridgerator and make dinner 5. Find the car keys I lost last