When tomorrow starts, I will be reborn. The blue-LED, electric alarm clock on my dark-oak nightstand flashes 11:56 PM. Four minutes until midnight. Four minutes and counting.

Shishkabob was spell-checked, and the internet ordered for the word Higashiosaka to be used instead. This led to an entire city in Japan being grilled. The rugby players fought b

It was amazing, that a lost tribe dwelled in the center of Nickolodeon's amusement park at the Mall of America. They were discovered when

The hairy neon orange monster, that lived in my closet as a kid has returned. He wasn't the same now, instead of reading me parts of "The American Who Taught the Japanese" He now

Growing up with stereotypical parents, all I wanted was to be different. To cause trouble.

"Begone those grey dingy vestmans! I'll make them white!" Samwise turned down the TV. Thank the Valar,Bilbo & Frodo didn't see Gandalf stooping to make commercials for $aruman, Inc

If I told you once, I told you a thousand times...don't pick your nose! Cramer bent his head in shame, knowing she'd have to tell him a thousand and one times. An anger boiled up

"The only thing missing from that, is a sausage patty," said Robert. Then Mike woke up and said, "And maple syrup."

Lhasa apsos are goo for

The thick, tea-dark water bubbled ominously as Jenna dipped her toe into it. "I don't know, Josh" she said, nervously looking back at her boyfriend on the trash-strewn beach, "I'm

I reached out with my mind and subtly milked the endocrine glands of the kid next to me in lab, causing a surge of adrenaline to flow throughout his body. With a mighty jerk, he

"Perhaps" the professor droned on, "on another Earth the War of Northern Aggression might have been lost by the Glorious South - but of course that is nothing but pure poppycock."

She shot up in bed, a crashing sound waking her from her deep sleep. She heard someone laughing from the doorway.

The sound that came from the loudspeakers started to feel like a stream of happiness, honey and marshmallows, and It was flowing directly into my thirsty ears. That was no "aspirin

The people of earth avoided looking at each other. We had too much to say, but had become very shy. It was as if we were all riding an elevator in silence, waiting for the doors

This story never ends, for when it concludes the very same events unfold just as I am going to relate to you now, & it is all my fault. I should have never have taken the drifter's

You never really notice how many ridiculous things you think of until you suddenly get the power to make what you think into reality. Presently I am surrounded by 34 Jiggly Puffs,

"Moroccan maracas masquerading as macaroons mamboed meltingly."

"Umm, uh, well, ah, 12?" "12?! 12?! What the hell is the matter with you! 12?! I can't believe this. You must be crazy. I ask you

@JeanValJean im goin 2 find u valjean u cant hide from the law. dam u #hashtag @Javert pls no i have to save this cute baby injured seal, then ill b rite back honest #hashtag