"Begone those grey dingy vestmans! I'll make them white!" Samwise turned down the TV. Thank the Valar,Bilbo & Frodo didn't see Gandalf stooping to make commercials for $aruman, Inc

He looked down at his steak. The blood bubbled up next to the pockets of fat and glistening gristle. Then he kissed the steak. Winked at it. Touched it with fingertips. Love.

As an artist, I am often questioned about the thought process that I enabled me to come up with my unique structures. My most recent work is being unveiled in the square of the

Would you rather for 10 minutes have to hang onto the top of a car going 100 mph OR try to stay on top of a hot-air balloon in the sky?

They are the Officials Of the Forever Department. They regularly record the rantings from the Ether Dole that

Between the drummers and the flames, Viktor Kamchatkin swayed in shaman's garb. His attendants gripped his chains. "In the year of the White Orca" he droned as his eyes rolled up

The soul came back two times. I think we’ve located it. Quick somebody catch it in the Birdhouse! We all ran toward the Birdhouse, but...it was too late. The soul had slipped away.

Gourmet girl dreams, that's what I deal in.

Who said I am pretty? Braids hang low like willow trees. Eyes glossed over with innocence. My knees buckle everytime a guy waves at me. My skin is the posterboard for mother Africa

The phone's piercing ring shattered Josh Robler's peaceful rest. His now bulging eyes belied the weariness that was trying to drag him back down. But once he picked up the phone,

Agent B52s Tricky mission: find a Cure for the Broken Social Scene. His contact said he’d find a Gold Panda At The Drive-In, under a pile of Cardigans behind the Dirty Projectors.

Being dead sucks ass.... I should know. I've been dead for just over an hour, and it feels like bloody eternity already. There's a crow approaching. Shoo! Leave my corpse alone you

"Um...cherry?" Jeff guessed. "Nope. Peach. Now my turn." I closed my eyes & stuck out my tongue. Jeff put one in my mouth & I sucked. "Black licorice." I said. "Still my turn."

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Smoking weed is one of the best things I can do, but tonight

Burroughs rang up Borges on his clatterdemalion. "Do you have anything to do with this? This is like my cut-up game, but I wonder about some of the source texts." Borges was in the

My goal is to find a way to resurrect the internet of 20 years go: back before commercialism and social networking and media paranoia. Waybac just doesn't cut it, obviously. When

It all began one dark, dark, stormy night...

Listen up Tony. Rule #1 of ABC construction. Start the noisiest work of the day at 6 am sharp so people know you arrived at work. Tony eagerly put on his ear protection

The central figure [X] reveals a male of refined and handsome features such as a formed and well groomed part of straight hair. A slight blemish or dimple above the left