It's been a week now since my wife left for

It's been a week now since my wife left for her mothers. I slept Surprisingly well for the first few nights of her absence, it felt great to come home to a quiet house.

Then the next few nights I grew restless. I'd said the words before, but now I realized that I really missed her. I missed my wife's breathing beside me. I missed the smell of

her as I held her during the night. But my wife was gone. Abducted. By mutant alien ninja genetically modified tomato plant ferret hybrids. Damn.

the mutant-alien ninja-tomato-ferret-hybrids were after my wife's garden, you see. That's what I keep telling the men in the funny white coats every time they come to my door.

And they come by daily, around 2 PM. And I show them my wife's garden. They verify it is real, and a likely target for mutant-alien ninja-tomato-ferret-hybrids. Satisfied, they

settled under a nearby oak tree to eat their vegemite sandwiches & wait, sure they'd spot the mutant creatures before sundown. But, much to my chagrin, the mutants didn't appear &

invisible dogs came to scout out the tree, er, that's what I think they are. You can see the trickling light emmitting off whatever light warping body is there. Began its sandwhich

and hem lengths. Laser field tailoring was a relatively new fad, and having the socially moble nvisible dogs as clients was sure to be good for business. The pickle dust was also

a favorite among the transparent hounds - a light dusting revealed them to the world, and a delicious self-licking hid them again. No doubt: dog fashion was IN this season.