"Is this legal?" "Oh yes. You've been traded

"Is this legal?" "Oh yes. You've been traded to [chain restaurant x] across the street for a burger flipping prospect and a bag of buns. Now turn in your uniform." My dirty nametag

was ripped from my chest. "GO!" my now former boss commanded, pointing me to Big Bob's Brown Boogie Burger Emporium. "They're waiting for you." I called my agent.

My agent didn't have anything important to say. So I fired my agent, pointing him to Big Bob's Brown Boogie Burger Emporium. That's where all the rejects went, I supposed.

I should know because I just came from there. I am a reject's reject. Even the losers don't want me around. Which makes me the most popular person with the popular people.

Or so I thought until I got the shock news that Jade hadn't invited me to her 17th birthday sleepover. I retaliated by organising a sleepover for myself in my own bedroom. Ha! Take

that you silly sod! I'm not buying you drinks anymore either! See, I got held back. A lot. I was a 21-year-old junior in high school, but I was very popular at parties

since I could buy booze and roll quarters off my rack like nobody's business. And drinking and rolling -- that's how you make it up the corporate ladder these days." The interview

didn't go well, but only because they hired someone that was so drunk they had passed out, which I think is cheating. A good accountant is perpetually wasted, yet still wide awake.

Accountants should stay conscious, if not sober, for at least the job interview's duration. Apparently he blacked out in the hiring manager's office and still got the job. Bad ju