Adrian Popplecock, official talent scout

Adrian Popplecock, official talent scout for Britiain's got talent. I pride myself on finding unusual talent. I scouted Mr. Methane & The Regurgitator. I got a tip to check out an

the last man alive to ever be called Mr. Popplecock. It wasn't that he couldnt' procreate, it was that he was so darned ugly. He looked like a melted bear wrapped in jelly fish.

Basically, he kinda resembled the Dunwich Horror. Maybe not coincidentally his legal name was Cthulhu Wilbur Popplecock. He'd been made fun of all his life, but now that he was

at the LovecraftCon." Did they even know he had PhD in Non-Euclidean geometry? No they wanted to pay 5 bucksa and have their picture taken with a REAL Dunwich Horror.

Dunwich is a drowned medieval sea port off the coast of Suffolk. When the graveyard collapsed into the sea, the beach was covered in human bones. My dog chewed a femur. The horror!

The horror was what crawled out from the marrow recess when my dog chewed through the bone. A shrill yelp escaped my hound, and for the next month the Dunwich vet said he took sick

with symptoms he only hinted at in furtive whispers. My dog became melancholic. The nameless horror that had crawled from the marrow roamed the night-shadowed Dunwich area at night

invaded the souls of every living thing, a mystical spiritual plague. From the outside, everyone appeared normal (even my dog), but on the inside, rage seethed patiently, waiting

...waiting...waiting. In due time, the customer service representative finally answered. But by then, I had already released my rage into the world. It was far too late.