In the beginning there was something. There

In the beginning there was something. There was something controlled and organized. Then God made something else.

He found this activity pleasing, making a thing that was not the other thing, so he made another thing, and another... Soon God was surrounded by things with various qualities.

These testimonies are buried in a deep hole under my bed. I don't let anyone into my bedroom so I'll have to give you a quick precis of some of the shorter ones. "My name is Kevin

and I'm an gamaholic." "- Hi Kevin," the congregation greeted him unanimously. Kevin continued, "It's been six days since I last touched my WASD keys, and I want to die." Silence

was interrupted by a quiet tapping sound. The circle of gamer's anonymous members ears perked up. Kevin volunteered to investigate, but then Twitchy jumped up and said, "

Wait!" Everyone froze. "I think it's morse code!" continued Twitchy. They all listened intently. .... . .-.. .--. / -- . The message tapped out again: .... . .-.. .--. / -- .

I rang Professor Edamski who translated Morse Code. He listened to the taps and wrote down the following words on the vellum paper we provided for his convenience:

"Dot dash dot dot dash dot dot." "Professor Edamski, what does it mean?" "The Morsians are just being assholes," He said, "The .-..-.-..- message just says that - Dot, Dash, Dot -

All this time the cleaning lady, Dot, had been listening in. With a wild look in her eyes, she dashed out of the office just before a meteor crashed through the roof.