"It was a dark and stormy night." Scratch

"It was a dark and stormy night." Scratch that. "During the whole of a dull, dark, and soundless day..." Nope. Plagiarism. Aw geez, thought Floyd, I've got writers block again.

Floyd turned to his muse. She was watching "The Price is Right" on a bean bag sipping a Fresca. "Oh now you need me." she mumbled. "Okay, stranger in town, yadda-yadda, go."

and the '70s!" Just then a new customer walked into Pink Floyd's barbershop. Aunt Bee scurried out before she could be asked more difficult questions. The new customer was a mar

keting exec. "Have a cigar", said Floyd. "Any color you like?". "Green is the color" said the Exec. Floyd gave him a dye & perm. The exec became comfortably numb in the hairdryer

and asked Floyd if he thought he could tell heaven from hell. Floyd told the Exec. to relax. He'd need some information first. He said "Come on you stranger, you legend, you martyr

, and shine!" The Exec. shifted uncomfortably and said: "You wore out your welcome with random precision. Goodbye" Floyd said, "See you on the dark side of the moon," and flounced

his ruffled skirt in the Exec's face. Floyd ran like hell to the dark side of the moon "I wish you were here," he screamed into nothingness. Floyd's comfortable numbness

was eclipsed in time by stress over money problems. When the rabbit that he sent to the moon oracle returned, Floyd said, "Speak to me, what sayeth the gods? Shall I perform a gig

of celestial favor?" Floyd's rabbit tossed a cute plush souvenir of a moonbat at his face, & had this to say to him: "They say they want you to turn down your damn outside lights!"