Last night I dreamt I was sitting in the

Last night I dreamt I was sitting in the front of a mini-bus squeezed between Tony Blair and a security guy heading to a water park when a fiery explosion on the horizon filled the

sitting of parliament. Parliamentarians in speedos and flippers made a grizzly sight. Tony Blair, grinning like a loon told everyone not to panic. I packed a small satchel and ran

barefoot through the long hallways, mad men in bowler hats barking insanely at my heals. "Wake up!" My mother shook me from my sleep.. What a bizarre nightmare! My dentist

warned me to never, ever bite my mother again, so I rolled over, went back to sleep, and resumed my dream. Now I was in a tunnel. I could smell scrambled eggs & bacon. A limp stoat

turgid no longer, flopped like a fish down the tunnel. From behind me, a woman screamed. I turned as if in slow motion. There was a light at the end of the tunnel, but it wasn't

a train, it was massive mole-beast. The light was bioluminescent bulb handing from its whisker. Claws and horrific teeth rampaged down the tunnel towards me

As I fled inside the nearest mouse hut and became a brown mouse. The beast went blind and crashedinto the wall, making such a racket that everyone woke up. The dog catcher came.

"Was there a game scheduled for this early hour", asked the groggy dog catcher lifting his leg at the waiter. I whispered silent as a mouse that there was no game but it was afoot.

What was afoot was that the waiter's foot was now in a puddle of dog-catcher urine and I no longer had an appetite. I left that restaurant and sauntered down the street, free.