Then kanalu died and his soul was sent to

Then kanalu died and his soul was sent to hell where it would rot until the end of time

Kanalu was in such a rage that he burst back out of hell to take revenge on the penguins that had killed him.

The penguins proceeded to keep his ass. Kanalu was so enraged he died again.

no trains but fish trains

The cabooses were giant embalmed fishes. Windows were cut along the sides and maws opened up to cloacas and so on. Interiors were luxurious. It chugged along puffing soap bubbles.

I leant out of the fish's annointed cloaca as it rolled along the rails. The wonder of caboose travel dazzled me. We pulled into a loafah station to refill with soap powder. My eye

(dangling as it was) took in the majesty of the loofah train station, all pink and shiny. As our caboose was getting the soap refill, I decided to take a look around. My gawd!

It was like a really bad episode of Dirty Jobs in here! Mike Rowe's got nothing on this place. I hurried back to the caboose and told her to forget the soap - we had to go. NOW.

As I entered the caboose, I saw her kneeling down trying to find the soap. She turned her head to ask me, but it suddenly occurred to me that she WAS Mike Rowe. I kicked the bucket