Nancy Reagan sat in her chair and had a damned

Nancy Reagan sat in her chair and had a damned cigarette. After all the work she'd done to help average idiots she had earned a smoke. She blew a smokering at the phot of Michelle

Williams, who was Nancy's favorite actor. "she reminds me of Gummi bears!", she would always retort, "so sick of the jellies that Ronnie always made me stick in my

ear whenever he was singing." It was a mystery to Nancy why Ronnie never liked her to hear him sing. In later life, she suspected it may have been because he changed the lyrics to

Beyonce's music in accordance with Wal-Mart policy, and disagreeing with Wally World could get Ronnie fired. He ended up being kidnapped by ninjas, as everyone knows, so he closed

only there let his ninja entourage know about his plans to take over the Louisianna Purchase State Park.

The ninjas cracked under the pressure.Craked with laughter,that is.He left to the Louisianna Purchase State Park anyway decided to take it by storm when a real storm,a big one

, blew up from the Gulf Coast. Bigger even than Katrina. The Ninja Turtle FEMA agents had already arrived at the Louisiana Purchase State Park when he got there, preparing for the

worst and hoping for the best. Turns out it was the best time to be there, but the worst was yet to come. The best worst thing was that the best guest had the worst wurst and the

best wurst insisted that it was a far, far better thing that it did than it had ever done. So the inscrutable wurst's secret, in its beating heart, was eaten with a little mustard.