Little Old Lady,or Lolly was a black and
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Little Old Lady,or Lolly was a black and white pussy....Cat! Pussy cat... She belonged to Sally,an 81er who just thought she owned the house.The real owner was of course,Lolly.
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Lolly was truly a dirty tramp. Ever since she learned of hedonistic pleasures, all higher pursuits were thrown to the wayside. The result was a leathery banshee, a shadow of what
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she was in her yearbook. Lolly, filthy, would ride the rails and make hobo stew with the other low lifes. She was a trampy tramp with a tramp stamp embracing the open road.
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She had gotten her baby taken away when she was fifteen by her grandparents. Now at eighteen she was leaving on the open road. A cigarette between her fingers and money in her bra.
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Unfortunately, she wasn't wearing a bra so all her road money fell out of her shirt while she was hitchiking. When she ran out of cigarettes she went to the store
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and and bought anti-depressants which quelled the nicotine craving by blocking the neuro-transmitors in her brain. The store had a help wanted sign. To fund her journey
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into the world of signaling molecules she wrote a foldingstory sponsored by a drug company about Alice Acid who was shrunk down to nano size and injected into the bloodstream of
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anyone who had ever folds a story. Yes, Alice Acid lives on through each of us here in the land of FoldingStory. Explains a lot, huh? This is why cryteons garmish the tillies and
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the borogroves are all mimsy and whatnot. With or without acid, FoldingStory writers are harbingers-- harangers, even--of munificent originality, vagary, genius and monstrosity
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. They're also mad on jam. Get some FS writers in a room with some jam and it's: Oi get off my jam. Leave it! Give it me! That's why we operate on the jam-free interweb. Yeah, jam.
5
- Started
- 2012-07-04 17:59:21
- Finished
- 2013-03-13 05:55:42
27 Comments
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lucielucie Mar 13 2013 @ 12:06
I love jam x
inatick Mar 13 2013 @ 12:46
I love jam too but why did I type and and?
SlimWhitman Mar 13 2013 @ 15:25
Log jam? I didn't even notice. It's surprising how often one skips over such typos without noticing them.
Chaz Mar 13 2013 @ 15:51
I thought it was a stutter from her nicotine habit.
lucielucie Mar 13 2013 @ 18:15
Maybe jam in your keyboard, inatick?
inatick Mar 13 2013 @ 20:31
Why do Americans call Jam Jelly? Or Jelly Jello? It is very confusing.
lucielucie Mar 14 2013 @ 13:55
Because they're Johnny Foreigner. I was just reading the wikipedia marmalade page. Apparently in German speaking countries they call their jam marmalade. But EU regulations say that marmalade has to be made from citrus fruits so they're not allowed to do that any more. They (the German speaking lot) feel that this is because of undue British influence over the stuff they put on their toast. And I'm like: call your jam what you want, like I give a monkey's!
PurpleProf Mar 15 2013 @ 00:09
We all have very vivid ijaminations.
inatick Mar 15 2013 @ 03:00
I recently read an article by an American lady raving about jam and cream on crumpets. It's just so wrong perhaps I should report her to the EU Toast Police?
lucielucie Mar 15 2013 @ 06:04
She's in the jelly jurisdiction so she should know better. And PurpleProf - that's a funny joke, just don't tell it to an Austrian.
Chaz Mar 15 2013 @ 10:52
Being an American, I have jam on my English Muffin.
inatick Mar 15 2013 @ 12:24
Chaz it's because you are American you didn't identify that it was putting cream on crumpets that was odd. Crumpets are usually topped with butter. Jam, honey etc is alright but cream and jam is for scones.
lucielucie Mar 15 2013 @ 12:28
Inaticks's right, Chaz, we"re cool with you putting jam on your muffin. Totally cool. Except... are you sure it's jam you're putting on it?
SlimWhitman Mar 15 2013 @ 13:36
Vegamite?
PurpleProf Mar 15 2013 @ 15:35
Let's see if we can settle this... I'll apologize ahead of time for my careless use of "their" instead of "they're" in my opening fold. http://foldingstory.com/kk924/
inatick Mar 15 2013 @ 15:55
Vegemite you can but personally I like crumpets best with just butter.
lucielucie Mar 15 2013 @ 15:57
Shouldn't Chaz be putting jelly on his muffin, if he's American?
inatick Mar 15 2013 @ 16:04
Yes but I could never say Jam as Jelly. It's like saying the wobbly kind of jelly on a muffin. Jelly on toast? Wtf!
lucielucie Mar 15 2013 @ 16:18
But Chaz himself typed, presumably not under duress, that he put JAM on his muffin.
inatick Mar 15 2013 @ 16:37
How do we know the EU toast police aren't standing over Chaz forcing him to type jam? I imagine the EU toast police are quite powerful.
Chaz Mar 15 2013 @ 18:59
My concern was that we have English Muffins, French Toast, and Canadian bacon but all America has to show for it is processed cheese product. :( In regards to the whole jam / jelly controversy. Jam has bits of fruit in it. Jelly is jam without the bits. Jello is a brand name for a gelatin dessert which the Brits call jelliy. Jelly-babbies are like sour-patch kids but sweeter. I hope this clears everything up. By the way, Toast was invented by England. Good Job!
SlimWhitman Mar 15 2013 @ 19:53
Hear, Hear, a toast!
lucielucie Mar 16 2013 @ 16:48
So no difference then really. Glad that's all cleared up.
lucielucie Mar 16 2013 @ 16:59
And although the British like to claim they invented most things, I can't believe toast is one of them.
lucielucie Mar 17 2013 @ 15:19
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080128052110AAP9FxS
Chaz Mar 17 2013 @ 17:38
I stand corrected, it was the Scots - "The first electric bread toaster was created by Alan MacMasters in Edinburgh, Scotland." - toaster, wiki
lucielucie Mar 18 2013 @ 03:32
That's interesting because if Scotland votes for independence next year they're going to use toast as their new currency. Genuine.