Her heart sank on viewing the photo of her

Her heart sank on viewing the photo of her ex boyfriend tagged along with her best friend on Facebook. Him doing shots off her belly button, her with a look of flushed glee.

was found on the back of a Rice-o-Roni box. First she had to boil water, butter and some milk. Her so-called friend asked what was for dinner, she did not mention that her ex

-ecutioner friend was on her speed dial. Frank was an old-fashioned killer who preferred such "archaisms" as guillotines and battle-axes. If her friend rubbed her the wrong way

she would put "Frank" on them. When Heather dissed her latest dress, Frank brought the gallows to bear. Her friends were more inclined to stay in her good graces. But the price was

ludicrous. In fact, clothing was overpriced all over the kingdom. So everyone just became nudists. Then they got a chill and all died of exposure. Frank's gallows got woodrot.

And thus began the age of enlightenment. With that, I finished my application essay for clothing-optional State U.Not buying clothes was the only way I could afford college tuition

. It'd taken me a year and a half to get used to the idea; even then, I wasn't about to be the *only* person on campus without the latest in trendy threads. State U seemed to offe

nd Marc Jacobs, who refused to allow his clothes to be sold in the campus bookstore. But in order to be accepted by the other biochemistry majors, I had to look chic. After I

considered this option, I decided it was not for me. I took a shower, put on the uniform and I looked fantastic. Other majors would follow as I'd glow awesomeness upon them too.