Lentil. Lens. Glasses. Michael Caine. Raincoat.

Lentil. Lens. Glasses. Michael Caine. Raincoat. Cloud. Rainbow. Fluffy. Bunny. Juggled Hare. Gravy. Flour. Clown. Syphilis. Insanity. Moon. Blue. Dark. Gentian. Hades. Persephone.

"I can't take it any more! We didn't start the fire..." Lenny Bruce. Blue Moose. Coca-Cola on the River Kwai. John Glenn. Aspirin. Journey There and Back Again. Karoke Bar...

My entire life flashed behind my eyelids as I lay there half-dead from smoke inhalation. Sirens growing louder, my pants were wet, the sensation of someone holding my hand. I had

Det. Manatee, returned from a holiday vacation in Hawai'i. "I saw POTUS, and boy, was he smiling! Oh by the way," -- he rolled my arm behind my back and cuffed my wrists -- "you're

comin' downtown, kiddo." Manatee whispered ruffly in my ear, as he dragged me by the arm to his undercover police car. "What for!?" I exclaimed, fighting against his flabby hands

and flippers, as he shoved me into the backseat with his bulging, blubbery belly. "You've got a lot of unpaid parking tickets, for starters," Det Manatee drawled. "Secondly,

I've been drinking and need a designated driver." Det. Manatee then shoved me into the front seat, dove into the backseat, slapped a pizza on the roof and told me to STEP ON IT!

I don't drive, but what the hell. I floored it. The pizza was the first casualty. Det. Manatee held onto my head like a baby koala and turned it to direct me. "RUN THAT RED LIGHT!"

I hit the accelerator HARD through the light, swerving into a gas tanker. Bits of metals flew everywhere as a fiery Shiitake mushroom cloud of investigation work came to a close.