I was perusing the American Section of the

I was perusing the American Section of the supermarket. I decided to make a Tootsie Roll casserole with pancake mix dumplings & chocolate sauce gravy. I love ethnic food!

I got more & more inspired. A Lasagne desert layered with oreos, marshmellows & cheez wiz. Pork rind M&M snickerdoodles. A gummyworm fishers net with a catch of goldfish crackers

A chocolate cake the size of a CRT monitor, smothered in horseradish. Wearable Velveeta cheese food product busts of legendary jazz musicians. My imagination soared beyond food.

Soon I was dreaming up magnificent flying machines made of cotton candy, and skyscrapers that could reach outer space, built entirely from Pixi Stix. It would make me rich, if I

could just stop eating my creations before I finished them. How could I help myself? The cotton candy helicoptor tasted like raspberries, and the pixi stix skyscraper tasted like

my fiscal report, I would have to change my stripes. Be the lizard tiger of the realm. Boarding a wiggle tram I ascended the spiral of squishy stairs to the rampart of destiny, det

ermined, I brought forth my scroll to the high hierophant. She adjusted her pince-nez. "Not a great year for corn." "Our quarter was down for sacrifices." I pleaded.

"I really wish there was something I could do," the hierophant looked at me, full of longing, "but you know the decree. We require that corn." A scream shot out of the pit, and I

, with all the corn I could muster, shouted "That is the pits!" The hierophant lit up in green fire, and with great gratitude, rose into the sun. Then it got brighter and brighter.