I dated a girl once by the name of Debbie

  • I dated a girl once by the name of Debbie Teeth who went by the nickname Spooky Tooth. Seems that I broke her heart, so she busted my jaw, and I had to eat my food through a straw.

  • Soon after, I bought myself an electric skateboard, took a cross-country trip to Utah, and married three women...all named Crystal. Then I started drinking heavily.

  • Not sure when my Kool-Aid problem got out of hand. Perhaps when I drank 30L without spilling on my white shirt. Whatever the case, I needed distraction from my 3 nasty wives.

  • Nasty Wife #1 suggested I go jump off a cliff. Nasty Wife #2 had already left me for another man more capable of drinking Kool-Aid without burping. Nasty Wife #3, well, she was

  • n't really nasty, she just left me because I was so grumpy about Nasty Wives #1 and 2. Wife #3 was kind and understanding, but smelled a bit off since I never paid the water bills.

  • But it's Wives #5 and #6 I really miss. They never said a word to vex me, although I did have their tongues removed so I guess the credit is due back to me.

  • However, do not speak of Wife #7. She has done terrible awful things. The most awful of which being: Seven ate Nine.

  • Wife #10 isn't my wife yet. She is only ten right now. I have a few years to wait for the marriage. Everything is in order and the whole temple knows we're betrothed. I doubt I'll

  • stop at 10. But I've got a few years to plan. Maybe wife #11 will be a really cool robot. But wife #12 should be from the temple again to keep them happy. To fulfill the prophecy

  • i will have to find wife #13, a demonic behemoth who will ultimately bring an end to the cycle by consuming the blood in my body up tothe last drip.Only then will my wifes be free.



  1. KieferSkunk May 04 2020 @ 17:33

    Way to carry the theme, guys. :)

  2. LordVacuity May 04 2020 @ 22:40

    I don't know if I'm married to it.

  3. Woab May 05 2020 @ 17:35

    I think that Debbie Teeth really dodged a bullet when she broke up with this guy instead of marrying him.

  4. Woab May 07 2020 @ 17:21

    Hey! The Debbie Teeth story made it to 100 likes! Dingdingding! Congratulations, fellow folders!

  5. KieferSkunk May 15 2020 @ 14:53

    Most popular story on the site for this period in time! And now with a dramatic reading by yours truly. :) https://voca.ro/1HUJZPju9Np

  6. Flopp May 16 2020 @ 08:43

    Great hearing you narrate KieferSkunk, very dramatic indeed

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!