Harry Hare and Tatty Tortoise were both classified

Harry Hare and Tatty Tortoise were both classified to run the one hundred meters race at the Olympics and they were both planning their trip to Rio when

Harry Hare came down with a severe case of Athlete's Foot and had to have his paw amputated. He learned to race without and carried it on a keychain for good luck. Tatty Tortoise

tut tutted about Harry Hare's superstition, but for good measure she hired Foxy Fox to steal Harry Hare's good luck paw. The animals all put their money on Harry Hare

because nothing is faster than a 3-legged hare! Imagine their dismay - Harry Hare had cut off another foot as a good luck charm. Could he out run Foxy Fox? Tommy Tortoise had bet

that he could, just because of the Hare's sheer amount of luck. Foxy Fox, however, scoffed at the idea. "A three-legged hare outrunning me? No matter how lucky he is, my intellect

is..." "Faster still?" Tortoise finished Foxy Fox's sentence for him as he zoomed past everyone, even Hare WTF??!! A trail of empty Red Bull cans littered the pathway behind them

like those crumbs in that trite little story about bad step moms. But Tortiose did not see the giant bean stalk that had just shot up to the heavens. He crashed. Foxy fox and

Chicken Little caught up & saw the Tortoise climbing the beanstalk with a bowl of porridge strapped to its back. 3 pigs came by with an ugly duckling & a Gingerbread Man in a wagon

loaded with night soil and pulled by Aristotle. "This event never happened," said one pig, "we were never here." The tortoise and bowl of porridge fell onto Chicken Little's head.

The pigs carted soil sneakily while Aristotle feigned oblivion. Next came Goldilocks & Jack falling from the sky onto poor Chicken Little's head. Anarchy was here. Newton laughed.