First, stand with legs wide apart and squat

First, stand with legs wide apart and squat down as low as possible. 2nd, put the palms of your hands on the floor in front of you & stretch out your fingers. 3rd, squoosh forward

with your hips, back and forth, really grinding into the burn. I happened to glance in the mirror and noticed that my yoga instructor was essentially dry humping me doggy style.

And panting. Oh what the hell, it's Friday, so I decided to have a little fun with my yoga instructor. "Bow-wow-wow! Yippy yo yippy yay!" I sang, matching his doggie-style thrusts.

45 minutes later, my yoga instructor and I were both tired & sweaty. Great workout. Plus I felt like I did something to support animal rights.

As I entered the changerooms, I noticed something strange. Lying on the ground , unconcious, with a bloody gash on its head was a giant M & M.

I locked the door hastily. As a chocoholic, this was the equivalent of a miner striking a gold vein! I drooled as I bent to lick the bludgeoned, giant M&M -- but he came to just as

my tongue made its way into the large chocolaty cleft left in the gigantic M&M. I was prepared to die to get my chocolate fix, and we both knew it. He shook his head and got u

p, grabbed me by the shoulders and yanked me away from the gargantuan M&M. A heavy chunk of chocolate clung to my tongue. I had to walk around like that for days before it fell off

fetched Pa's truck and carted all the giant candy home. Who could refuse a lifetime's supply of chocolaty goodness?! I later came to regret it bitterly, but that's another story...