As Bob sat in Church, he counted on his fingers

As Bob sat in Church, he counted on his fingers how many of the Ten Commandments he was breaking. "Let's see, I'm coveting Dave's wife, and all of her goods. And I'm about to steal

his Linsay Lohan Playboy issue. Bob worshipped Linsay,well her body anyway which violated the first two commandments. Just as he'd resolved to make a clean sweep,the Pastor noticed

that one of the women in the church looked familiar. The Pastor could smell alcohol around the woman in the Burka. The Pastor said, "Ms. Lohan?" Bob's heart skipped a beat.

They both froze and then Lindsay screamed "Run!" She took off down the aisle but tripped on her Burka and ended up sprawled face first on the ground. The entire church could see

post-haste. On the way out of the church, Lindsay bumped into an a ghetto thug. They both fell flat on their butt. Her burka had flown up over her head and she was struggling to

fight the urge to start up a musical theater program and fix up his neighborhood using her strong will and kind-heartedness. "Yo, you scuffed my new sneaks," he fumed.

But his words fell by the wayside as she swept him up in her arms, holding him above her head "how would you like to join me on a journey?" "are you nuts?!" taken be surprise he be

at it outta there as fast as he could, terrified, only stopping to look behind him once he got around the bend of the magic road.Doubled over, he tried to catch his breath, but she

just kept running faster and faster. The unisex Olympic race was finally won by a woman. A new world record had been set and she was hailed a sporting legend.