Finished Folds (2701—2720)
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5precedence, which is understandable. He eventually went pro in backroom waitress rutting and is now retired, living comfortably on the east side of Des Moines. What a country!
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4Jim's measly buck-seventy-five in poundage. After Jim had thoroughly realized and tested this freedom from gravity is when the fun really started. On his first
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6The reply (which shocked me quite a bit actually) was "OK, but only if we can stop by my brother's place first and steal a fifth of vodka." The question had been "
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2Vlad, the fishmonger of ill repute who'd settled over by the abandoned nuclear plant. The overgrown toothfish led the fearsome Kraken to the Gates
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6various versions of leave, get out, beat it, scram, etc. etc. There I stood. Not leaving. Staying. At first it was just out of spite, but after a few hours it became
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3The happy expectance on Jesus's face was quickly extinguished when the Christmas lights failed to go on after plugging them in. And now the age-old question can be answered: WWJD??
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4was just out of reach. Damn these blasted alligator arms I'd inherited from Dad! OK, well if we can just turn in our cards, take South Africa, and then redeploy our troops
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3and I went down like a sack a potatoes. Y'know, it never does go down like in the movies. My advice: when the unmuppets take Manhattan, it's best just to let 'em take it.
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3wouldn't take no for an answer. Listen, it's called the reverse moose goose and all my girlfriends say it's just the best! Here's all you need to do: just shimmy out of that robe &
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8booty and log some serious R&R. But the sharks weren't satisfied with just the Cap'n. 4 great whites began circling the ship and when a large wave crested over the side
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3said "surprise sucka!" and removed the previously invisible Saran wrap. He kissed a baby loaf of swiss on the head and stepped over the line. I nearly dropped my slicer, the smell
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5If I were a pincushion I would let various pointed objects penetrate me as their will desired, but again, I'm a prostitute so really, what's the diff? But if I were a
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6Question: Do the perpetrators of the Gurtvin Invasion hail from Gurt, Gurtv, Gurtvin, or some other assemblage of vowels and consonants? The answer
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3With my mind's eye focused on the idea that an infinite number of monkeys on an infinite number of typewriters will eventually create a work of Shakespeare I set about assembling
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4And don't answer with anything snarky like those halfwits on FS.com. "Probably because you're on the border of Gurt." Or "Maybe if your watchtower was higher than a midget's
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5Dude Chills on a Beanbag and featured a whole lotta nothing. Thanks to one key rave review in the inaugural beanbaggery expose, the show was a hipster hit and everyone tried to exp
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3Here's the thing: I'm only human. On top of that I'm a dude, so I'm only a MALE human. You people have got to lower your expectations a few notches. I mean, if you're going to
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4I replied "The brighter the candle lit, the darker the shadow cast." Just then we entered the tunnel. The click clack of the rails grew louder and I closed my eyes, relishing every
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2which is why is quit my 9-to-5er, which had been steadily degenerating into more of an 8-to-6/6:30er and sold myself into slavery. The chains did chafe a little but we got all the
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4Luckie found himself at the Unicorn races again, with his last eight gold pieces clinking together in his pocket. He was faced with the sad decision of whether to