Finished Folds (641—660)
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3a small, hairy gentleman who'd traded a sheet of blotter acid to a homeless man on Venice Beach for an annual pass. He was dressed up as Belle. The 2nd Disney 'princess' Kara saw
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2that her cat had puked in her favorite shoes. Again. "Damn it Mr. Bob Jingles! Where are you!" Her 8:30 meeting forgotten, she went on an angry hunt for her hairball-afflicted feli
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5I thought deserved it. I looked down at my cell. 34 new texts. But all of them said "I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST NIGHT". Oh no. Oh shit. No no no. I rummaged around for my go-bag. Who
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6I 'came to' rather than 'woke up'. Where was I? Some kind of expensive hotel room. I was wearing the same clothes I'd had on at the convention. "Hello?" No answer. I ran my hand
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2getting increasingly agitated. They always used to be all "What's up fool!" But lately they were all "What's up. Fool." Albert kept bumping his boom box though. Always loudly. He
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6had my complete attention. I was 52% aroused, 38% terrified, and 14% black out drunk. Without releasing her death grip we caromed around the dance floor. Sharonda and Lydia
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4"Just don't make me look like such a total idiot again George. I mean honestly, you should have seen their faces. Disgust. And rightfully so. I was a moron up there. Just glad it's
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2setting nicely on the west face." "Far out" he said & strapped on some skis. An hour later he was riding a lift with a female with five eyes & a large penis growing out of her head
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4She held out her hand. "What?" Christie growled. "Governor! You said there'd be a reward!" "I have no recollection of such a statement" he said. "Plus I was an athlete in school."
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3-deal to a few long-hairs and while I was in there I hit the donkey a couple times with an epi-pen I had in my sock. When it was time for the race, the donkey ("Haulin' Ass") was
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4one monstrous screaming O. Just out of the blue: wham-o. There'd be some mighty surprised camel jockeys out there I chuckled. I focused all my newfound top-god energy on the camels
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4pillows were at the bottom of this whole mess. This would be very hard to explain. I checked my watch. They were due home in 45 minutes. MAYBE enough time to get to the store and
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2either resulted in the opposite side swelling up and if you went back and forth for a while you'd end up with quite a mess on your hands. The Flatland worms plus-sized genitalia
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3Steve McManaman and he was a man's man if ever a man's man lived. The gods chose Steve to receive the trident of power because they figured he'd blast the ever-loving daylights out
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4determined that I was pregnant with the unborn child of a dancing midget. What's more, the test revealed that the female snail penis count was going down. I had a lot to digest and
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3But just so I know what we're dealing with here why don't we take it from the top. You don't mind if I record this do you? OK great. So, what were you saying about multiples again?
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1His face was blank. With every word of Grandpa's song, Billy's brain had slowed down until he'd entered a comatose state reminiscent of frontal lobotomy patients. Grandpa's plan wa
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5Twerk: verb. To gyrate one's hips up and down with the buttocks extended to elicit a bouncing in the gluteous maximus. Rump shaking. Webster IV looked up his next submission:
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5My wife wanted out of our marriage so I concocted a plan whereby my wife would seduce crazy Melinda's husband. Melinda & I would pretend to be devastated & then we'd live happily
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3under the glass coffee table. The cops banged on the door. "Open up! We have a warrant for your arrest!" The door splintered apart and a SWAT team rushed in. They didn't notice