Finished Folds (321—340)

• 5
  hated being the middle child. As a conjoined triplet, his brothers controlled their limbs, but his trump card was bowel control. So, under his insistence, they took up ballet and

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 17:20:13

• 2
  ex wife, inspired by the dried-up desolation. Chuckling to himself, he

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 17:13:37

• 0
  her fangs. Not subtle, but usually effective, this caused a

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 17:12:39

• 2
  Like the caress of an undead lover, she ached for the sensation to be repeated until

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:58:50

• 2
  earwax and chicken soft tacos. This caused her to make a face like she'd smelled a

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:56:09

• 0
  a pimp teaching his 'ho not to pocket the profits. She was out of Advil, so she opted instead to self medicate with

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:54:09

• 2
  Daphne's missing period. Fred and Velma were at their weekly campus LGBT meeting, so it was up to the two of them to discover the Secret of the Missing Menses. They started by

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:48:31

• 2
  an old soup bone she had named Dr. Oz and started sucking out the marrow, unaffected by the sounds of disgust of the people around her. This led to my aunt's eventual

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:44:19

• 2
  much to the delight of the priests in the front row, who could barely contain themselves when confronted with the sight of so much exposed man flesh in the pool. Naked, he

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:41:04

• 1
  happens it would be a tragedy, since you are the last classically trained sack performer in the world. Sure, bag performance is a dime a dozen. But no one else has mastered the

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:37:17

• 2
  town and boring life to to become a drag queen, just like his father had so many years ago. His secret passion was obtaining bootleg copies of

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:34:44

• 0
  intense anal itching caused by the medications he took to control the other conditions. This led to some embarrassing incidents, like that time he

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:32:21

• 1
  settling down to watch "Real Housewives of Muncie," which followed 5 overweight women in an Indiana trailer park. Sure it was trash TV, but he loved those escapades, especially the

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:30:11

• 2
  coupons out of the Sunday paper. He barely had enough time in a day to oppress women and gays. It was a ruse to cover his addiction to Internet porn and rent boys. So, the Pope

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:26:39

• 3
  to stain the hardwood floor. His last thought was that they would be ruined and he'd just had them installed last spring after watching one too many home decorating shows on HGTV.

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:22:02

• 5
  "Two Girls and a Cup" had that effect on most people. Well, except for grandma, who giggled through the whole thing. "Amateurs," she scoffed, noting that in her day, she had

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:19:08

• 1
  and my aim just as high. As he crossed the bridge, I

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:15:15

• 3
  I only hesitate to remove my bulkiest piercingings before diving in. No need to drown, being weighed down by the large metal studs attached to my

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:13:29

• 1
  since I only watched C-SPAN call-in shows, that's sadder than it sounds. Meanwhile, the embryonic beings in the holding cell started to move, causing me to

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:10:27

• 0
  Although on second thought, honey mustard sounded better. Nothing like that tangy flavor with the slight heat of

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  Davodd

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  2011-02-18 16:06:57