Finished Folds (581—600)
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4Freaks and Geeks, paying special attention to how awful James Franco's acting is...then make a Dagwood Sandwich and leave it for beaver. Don't get discouraged...Good Times...
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5I couldn't make up my mind who I wanted to be: the bound woman, the withered lover, the angry princess, or the dire mother. To be a truly great serial killer, you must have a name
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6trail was getting cold, so Det. Manatee called his old friend Ford Fairlaine and offered him a food processor if he'd come to Vancouver and help catch the Sufi mystic graffitist,
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6"Mr. Orwell, can you hear me?" "Blair! Arthur Eric Blair is my name! Why do you call me from the 21st Century about 1984? What about Animal Farm?" Click. He hung up, again.
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2e toilet and make sure he wiped himself really well. The sound engineer hated the smell of rotten eggs in the studio. Then the caller broke in wielding poisoned chopsticks and
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4For some inexplicable reason, I sat in a Chinese restaurant speaking broken Spanish. A little man with squinty eyes dropped his chopsticks, covered his ears and screamed, "NO sins
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3he could take another step, a woman rushed Merin Tarbolom with a paper mache mallet and beat him over the head with it I grabbed him of course at his wrist and twisted it until h
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9I grinned at Det. Smithers' remark. "Then I'm in the clear. You said the killer must have eaten North Carolina pulled pork, and I ate Memphis ribs." He had elucidated more than
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1Two-fingered Mary. I dated a girl named Three-fingered Mary. Could she have lost another finger and changed her name? Why did she leave a "Something's going on" note in my locker
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5uck, big league...literally...they suck on coffee coolattas and coffee cubanos and Cuban cigars and sugar cane and sugar beets and Lady Ga Ga's pechos. Beautiful do whatever they
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3r and caused a quake worse than the Northridge quake of '94. Once at the airport, with their Bermuda shorts now stained from explosive diarrhea, with every flight grounded, they
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3gorges grow barren with boredom. As Chince mixed a new batch of punch, his beard grew urgently and the tip of it danced across the brew like a figure skater high on crack.
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6Some call it outrageous in its pointlessness;others, caring and optimistic of the illuminati I detest the foreigners I have gathered together on this crowded sphere We have dismant
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5disturbed by his request that she moved to the Netherlands and had sex change surgery. McGurk searched for her, but without luck. Maxwell Crackenbush opened a pot shop in Denver.
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2stockpile of awards she had won over the years. The stench of burning rubber caused Meryl to shut down the vacuum. She ripped her Presidential Medal of Freedom from the brush
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5I have adopted the practice of pacing...back and forth...left and right...up and down...day-in and day-out...but I'm not really sure why I do it, unless, of course...I happen to be
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4...or, wait...was it three iridescent eyes that only looked like one...in either case, it winking at me caused a chill across my back, and I shuddered not unlike the way I do when
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6and then I wake up, only to realize that I dreamt that I had dreamed it was the REAL exam day. Now it is the day after exam day and I missed it, I Failed to take the exam...egad!
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1unless they offered a free weekend (he hated paying for anything). Arlo grabbed his date in a headlock and yanked her down to the glass-covered pavement. "Who's the boss, beoch?
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3the idiotic way you purse your lips and snort, (6) those hideously long ties. (7) how you treat women..."Wait!" he interrupted, what's wrong with my ties? I thought you liked my