Finished Folds (7781—7800)
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3So to prevent her frivolous nonsense from entering his consciousness he loaded a shotgun, rigged it so that when the front door opened it would blast her straight in the
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2Melissa Rivers fell asleep in the after glow of sex. When she awoke
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1A hologram of a bad actor with a cheap cigar appeared. Scott Bakula asked, "Who am I?" And the Hologram said, "Uh...let's see, you're Joseph Stalin and this is 1942 and
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1totally all about male sexuality. Giant, armored, heaving, muscular Knights who can only see each other. They can toast their masculinity, they can draw swords and
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1It was Tiger Woods. He was drunk and armed with an Uzi. He took a swig of 151 and
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1She said, "Uncle Murrey, your shoulder is pregnant." So I shouted, "At least I've been through puberty Samantha!" Just then her mom, my sister walked around the corner and
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0bullet in her teeth. I could smell her enamel burning. She pulled out her shotgun and started blasting. The church crowd was crumpling up in a heap of blood and torn clothing,
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2She was an idiot, yet she inherited the Oxford Chair of Speculation. It was her duty to make shit up in front of these "real" eggheads. She cleared her throat, "Back To The Future
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1The problem was that I'd left my wallet in Bellevue. Cassie said, "Fuck wallets, let's go to Tacoma." I didn't mind smoking a joint on the way there but I owed the Puyallups
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1her sister, "Chalula." Tatula was nice, but Chalula was fiery. She was spicy. Everybody wanted to take her top off and shake her, get her juice all over their meat. Tatula was
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3pure dribble. Nursery Rhymes were invented by the MI6 to control the world and have everyone secretly worship castles and royalty. Hit them while their young was
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2No they wouldn't. The pirates slapped her hands away from her nipples. The bearded fiends suckled like her jugs were jugs of rum. There was no food in the survival boat so
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2it took me days to get to his office because I wouldn't follow advice on how to get there. I flat refused to put the letter in envelop just because someone told me to. And when I
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2friggin' time. It was annoying, so the "pervert" decided to make a chart so that we would never be at the same window at the same time. I was an artist, so I wore a smock and he
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2the art curator from the Guggenheim. Yes he was babysitting, but he certainly could tell great art when he saw it. In fact, he almost wept at the bugs bunny hill billy cartoon, now
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3Which put me in a bind because I was the Lead Dentist at this Dentists office. But I'd opened my practice in the South and there were a lot of "days off." So I gave up on hygiene
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1chloroform to play hide and seek at the office. It was his solution to T. Barnes always "peeking." When the person passed out it gave everyone a chance to hide, except
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1She pulled out a giant, gelatinous dildo which glowed in the pale moon light. She joggled it to make it wiggle. Was that an eyelash hair on the tip? She spread his
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2his love life. He wanted her to ask him about it. But instead she lectured him on it. It was the state of his unions address. Not enough girth. To fast on clit-patrol. More asians
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2burn down your tree house you evil monkey. Everyone at the committee gasped. Did that come out of the Dean of Student's mouth? He looked for an RA to blame but he could