Finished Folds (81—100)

• 2
  Do you check udon noodles' "al dente" status also by throwing them against the wall to see if they stick? He continued to noodle the question in utter vexation.

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  2011-02-05 20:56:25

• 2
  psoriasis. The pretty, pretty, princess headed out to CVS to get himself some medicated salves and lubricants.

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  2011-02-05 20:53:57

• 2
  "CALL THE EXTERMINATOR!" the chef shrieked at the top of her lungs as she burst out of the pantry.

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  2011-02-01 01:23:42

• 1
  Granted, I don't like broccoli, but Sandy's cheese sauce made the green veggie tolerably. However, once I discovered that the sauce contained

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  2011-02-01 01:18:29

• 0
  Kirk Cameron stopped giving the cop fellatio in the truck stop restroom long enough to discover that

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  2011-02-01 01:16:59

• 2
  Carrot Top's face finally fell off. I was there to see it. You're probably wondering why I am even admitting that I attended one of shows. That's fair, but you must understand:

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  2011-02-01 01:15:12

• 1
  I knew this day would come. Cher

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  2011-02-01 01:13:23

• 1
  I like milk. Always have. My cousin Lenny made fun of my latent lactose

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  2011-02-01 01:12:54

• 3
  Cyndi hated it when you misspelled her name. She wasn't Cynthia or Cindy. Her insistence on the right spelling landed her in trouble last Tuesday, when

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  2011-02-01 01:10:57

• 1
  The charred earthen birm circled the sacrifice pyre. Remnants of those long ago offered for consumption littered the edge of the pit. Liza Minelli

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  2011-02-01 01:08:23

• 1
  A mime is a terrible thing to waste. Just yesterday,

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  2011-02-01 01:02:51

• 3
  Emmet Otter and his Jug Band crew could tie one on better than the rest of them. Unfortunately their stupor kept them from winning the piano Ma Otter wanted. Damn drunk otters.

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  2011-01-31 20:11:02

• 3
  The native peoples were "all set" with the native car monikers. Why couldn't we have more Edsels or Whities rather than Aztecs, Pontiacs, and Cherokees?

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  2011-01-31 17:12:43

• 2
  as the auto body / plastic surgery specialist sanded the last sharp bit to from Anderson Cooper's metallic nose.

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  2011-01-31 17:08:43

• 2
  Pamela Anderson was taken to animal control and put down... not actually euthanized, just told that she was smelly and that she had plastic appendages.

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  2011-01-31 16:41:30

• 4
  too much for him. He lept to his feet and clamored, "F*cking zombies! Why did you make mother a mother f*cking zombie?! What I am supposed to give her for Mother's Day?"

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  2011-01-31 16:39:07

• 3
  The transvestite cowboy donned both his bolo and his boa and lept off of a cliff, solving that conundrum for once and for all.

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  2011-01-31 16:32:51

• 1
  both believed that the purple of his new uniform coordinated well with the purple of his winky. After their "congress," she said, "Do me a Favre-r. Retire. 'cause you need to."

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  2011-01-31 16:30:05

• 3
  With that, the anthropormorphic inanimate object ceased thinking to itself. The hallucinating, bi-polar resident of Tender Meadows began to feel the effects of his meds.

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  2011-01-31 16:26:07

• 3
  chewed to the quick. I nervously had awaited this day, playing in my mind over and over. I embraced my daughter for the first time in over 30 years.

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  2011-01-31 16:22:43