Finished Folds (281—300)
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4have enough trans fat to choke a mule. A little extra mass won't hurt, so long as I move to a planet with lower gravity. I dodged the boss Galaga and licked the brownie batter off
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8When an author dies, new novels are still published, especially if the author dabbles in ghostwriting. Jimmy Raven hovered over the blank page like a miasmal cloud. Romance novels
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4They are tethered to the core with their own numerical umbilical cord, Captain. Kolians share emotions, memories, and a consciousness with Kolia and one another. I bet there's oil.
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9. "It's survival of the fittest," said Jack. "I'm unfit, so all other species must end." Next on his hit list: ivory-billed woodpeckers, the poor bastards. Oscar's animal sanctuary
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5and thumb war tactical treatises in Quentin's sleep. His thumbs had the Midas touch of intelligence, granting smarts to the most rotary of phones. If only Quentin touched himself,
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5on their backs and passed out, thumpity thump thump. I threw them in the corner. A warlock hovered in saying, "I have more power than you." Heh, amusing. His spells vs. MY liquor?
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5Sophie's onion breath was tear-inducing, but collapsing was melodramatic, even for Pete. He crushed her bag of prescription mints. Great, now Sophie was growling too. The neighbors
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4Linda checked her phone and had a revelation. "I'll stuff Janey into an OtterBox for safety. Why am I like the best parent?" The Prepubescent Witchery School Pageant was a success
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3likely because I'd cornered him. I said, "Beau from above, may our every embrace titillate the bards." He skipped by me and hopped onto the bed. My rock collection orbited him like
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4linguistic stilettos, so to speak. Her drug addiction fueled her genius, unbeknownst to her peers. Cheryl stumbled down to her lab. There it was: Pepsi. She rode the brown dragon
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5heartstrings... to live... in an imperfect world of skinned knees. Forgive me, parent, I... must indulge in a good existential cry every now and then." I take him out for ice cream
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9coffin right before I close it so my laughter will echo while the worms devour his corpse. That'll teach him to not speed in a school zone. Tomorrow's lesson: Fun with Merging.
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2-ed with angel wings. I fingered through my file folders. "'Panga,' 'Pengo,' ah, 'Penguin Jerky.'" I dropped a strip on Bob's lunch and it too flew. A skein of flightful bird meat
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2or the Lacerated Sky of '86, which ruined the contents of Janet's candy dish. As Nick's neck acted like a crimson sprinkler, the necrophobic actuary in the next cubicle retched and
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2flee to his Nilefront sandcastle. Staying meant death by chocolate tuxedo cream cheesecake. Tempting. Buddy Tut wanted to outlive that other Tut guy; he mounted his royal scorpion
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3wet stuff flooding all inhabitable land. But alcohol is supposed to help you forget past regrets, not formulate future ones. He put a cocktail umbrella in his whiskey. How cheerful
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4I dug it out of my pocket and looked up "Bigwig CEO" in my contacts. "Hi, pretty pissed off here. There are salt water turtles in my glass. I was promised fresh water! You are so
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1before forcing them down. Crocs were a bland garnish typically served with human children, not her favorite. The lioness put a napkin in her lap and seasoned the woman. A pinch of
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4making demands of Me? I delegate menial tasks like baptisms to humans!" Mr. Lee was unfazed. "Well, God, if I'm gonna get a wash, I want the premium service. Can the lightning and
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7Because his wife was in there too. "Gawds, Throckmorton, what did you eat?" she'd say. This echo chamber wasn't the romantic cave from the brochure; it was a box in an underfunded