Finished Folds (61—80)
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6She was smothered with a catcher's mitt. "I dedicate this kickflip to you, babe," Mike said to the sky. The tiny skateboard broke beneath him. "Noooo!" He handled the murder better
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5office politics at its worst. He said, "Give it," which meant I had to. My boss power flossed under his braces, exorcising those popcorn demons. He was ready for Short Circuit 2
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1Or maybe Hulkian anger got stuck in her throat. She thought to ask a scientist; dozens were strewn about the beach with radiation burns. "My neck is huge. Is escargot safe? Hello?"
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1WINGS OF A DOVE, this is what happens when feng shui enthusiasts write books. We poor, poor readers are being bored to tears by trivial ruler details. The protagonist should write
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7The smell wound its way out of the labyrinth and blanketed Crete in a scat-and-decay omnistench. The Gurlygog's ears went unscratched, but minotaur bones are fun to chew.
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13mental state. It was an entirely wrathless state he achieved with 10 years of total indifference at work and in the bedroom. But this fold, THIS FOLD. Peter's dormant neurons awoke
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3bribed a doctor instead of a janitor. At least he'd die in a clean room. "He can lower his heart rate with daily aerobics and meditation," the janitor said, mopping up sweat and
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3decisive as ever. Just know that I am in love with my 2010 Prius Liftback." Watching so much TV turned Dido into a product sponge. Dave didn't mind; Toyota was a fine manufacturer
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5his Dinosaurs Loved Jesus campaign have blown up in his face? That was the last time Bill Nye would reach across the aisle in those debates. He went full rational, disgorging logic
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5Especially the rap game. Beat Bat really turned the tables on that scene. Shelley fumed because Beat Bat rapped about "my bitch." Either she was a bitch or he loved another bitch.
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2or both. He shoved corn in the spam babies' mouths because only corn-fed beef had the saturated fat he craved. Then Tommy set them on his hammock. It snapped; they were ready. Mmmm
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3Susanna was the ultimate master of this. When Ichabod would stagger home at 3 a.m. caked in lipstick, he wouldn't register on Susanna's visual spectrum. Total ominousness denial.
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4Canada? Everyone who lives there is turned into a moose, talk about dehumanizing. I fist bumped the hip security guard at the U.N. to get in. The moose problem needed international
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1prattled long enough. In walked sassy interior decorateur Niecy Nash. She grabbed grandpa by his mustache and said, "Spice up those baseboards with high-gloss ruby enamel, or else
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0Margaret Thatcher invade Japan. Luckily, she collected the scalps of 150 British orphans and used them to summon the ghost of Winston Churchill. He worked with Pokemon's developers
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4Then she spoke again, and I was spewing steam like one of mother's blueberry pies. I decided to cash in on the goodwill I built up by doing chores. "Mother, silence this idiot girl
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6I told it to this guy once. When my words hit his ear, his ear died on impact, just kinda sagged there and turned gray. Before I tell my T-Rex Burger of a story, sign this waiver
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5-h in Bahston? Cannibal horse watched the Celtics game with human friends. The hooves disagreed with his stomach, sure, but his stomach was a better fate than a bottle of Elmah's.
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6cup of coffee." When he arrived at Starbucks, protesters were shouting, "Venti is adults! Grande is children!" Damn, Soylent Corporation owned everything. He ordered grande because
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3Brad was majoring in nude modeling for Clemson art majors. "I'm so sure I'll pass, I didn't pack any clothes," he told Marvin. Nudist versus Prudist, who will blink first? Marvin.