Finished Folds (861—880)

• 11
  Lou Bergs had traveled all the way through time to mow my lawn. He swore that my single mom's grilled chicken breast was worth the trouble, though I suspected darker motives. Penet

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-15 17:08:14

• 4
  I snuck them into my pocket when no one was looking. You know how much 3 pennies fetches on the open market? 3 thoughts, that's how much. Sans its 3 dead Lincolns, the Opera bombed

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-15 17:04:49

• 4
  fire on a bed of smoldering Michelin, though the integrity of the cake was compromised by the hobo footprint that smushed the "irth" in "Happy Birthday". The baker's mortality

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-15 17:02:03

• 4
  Sorry, but I can't stop twiddling my thumbs. I'm working out to drop weight classes in time for the thumb wrestling tournament at recess tomorrow. Next, I'll do Ring Pop sit-ups.

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-15 16:43:30

• 5
  porn cellar, the one with the stained glass windows of Solomon's "Song of Songs". The Cuban Mafia caught Father Handsey and threw him into the Gulf of Mexico, but he walked it off.

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-15 16:40:19

• 3
  goggle, just one. Actually, make that a beer monocle. I want to watch you save my cheesecake from croc-infested waters without thinking you're more than mildly attractive. Time is

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-14 22:26:35

• 3
  smoking café gift certificate boiled down to a fizzly syrup. The hash browns recipe could stay unchanged by these standards, another victory for convenience. Future McDonalds toys

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  2013-02-14 22:22:58

• 4
  wondered if it was the cheesy kind. "Could we fire the moon from a big potato cannon? I have a few targets in mind besides my ex's house," they all thought at once. LBJ quieted

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-14 22:20:13

• 5
  t's applesauce, the sweet appetizer for the ultimate PBJ prize that was the Hartford J.Crew outlet. This Connecticut bog was his veggies, a mild but necessary inconvenience. Torso

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-14 22:16:13

• 6
  ld explain how the jewels went from the display case to Augusta's purse via Augusta's hand without it being her fault. Augusta's disposition to beauty made her worry lines parallel

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  2013-02-14 22:12:37

• 3
  decree to detain us. He stretched his baton with his torturer's brawn to account for my tightly-walled..." "Heinous! Your limericks, dear leprechaun, warrant a swift kick in the

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-14 22:10:07

• 4
  less nimble of mind than of foot, yet Sarah was a worthy rival to Jack Be- and his partner, Mr. Quick. Sarah took them both on in a quick time event in her virtual ballet studio.

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-14 22:00:50

• 5
  of the piano falling overhead was crushed by the piano, as was our female protagonist. The evil rogue Stoats slid down the drain pipe to collect their prizes: a bikini, dentures

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-14 03:51:57

• 4
  had to take down his Christmas lights on Feb. 2nd to conform to San Diego law. He hyperextended his dominant cancer cure-injecting arm and coulda sworn his wife said, "Fall on me."

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  2013-02-13 21:57:37

• 11
  see if it's still good after after 2 years." The bubblegum Pop-Tart looked innocent enough, but then it growled at me and muttered something like "rabies" or "babies". Either way,

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  2013-02-13 14:02:19

• 4
  forgotten that the most important part of rescuing is self-preservation? I activated my "Help, I've fallen in a volcano and can't get up" button. A little role-reversal never hurt

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-13 13:59:17

• 5
  -men's center, where creepy dudes hung out to pick up college chicks. Bentley taught himself French to woo them, but they had things called "dignity" and "self-respect". No tongue

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  2013-02-13 13:54:35

• 5
  of Antarctica, where their single "Touch Me I'm Slick" hit #1 on the charts faster than you can say, "That penguin in the front row took her top off." The GreenBananas moisturized

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-13 13:51:31

• 2
  stealing all the space. The Universe Planning Committee wanted to put an intergalactic space bar where Earth and its belligerent inhabitants floated, but they had some morals. TNT

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  buddyboy4711

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  2013-02-12 19:27:38

• 5
  Nothing gave my satanic roommate more joy than hitting me with a thunderbolt right before the Wario Stadium ramp. Ha, I could play dirty. I replaced his nasal spray with holy water

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  2013-02-12 19:24:05