Finished Folds (101—120)
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5I made it to the dock in just the nick of time. A week later, I was crossing into E. Syria, toting the POTUSburger in my ice-packed satchel. The ISIS commander received the patty
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4"Could be. Give it the ole college try." Following the misfire, I found myself drifting atop an asteroid, a fragment of the home planet I had just destroyed. The Martian had failed
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1scruples whatsoever. Not as a lawyer, not as 1st "Lady", nor Senator, nor Sec. of State. A complete sociopath! Now, she can twerk like nobody's business, but I cannot vote for
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2When I open my eyes, they are gone. I am not where I was before. It is silent. Vague humanoid forms, beige, or perhaps khaki, lumber about in the dim light. Their bowed heads seem
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7-ant chauffeur, Zee, by the elbow. "Drive me to the clinic. I might not make it. Be strong, and take care of my pet giraffe if I go." My giraffe is also named 'Zee'. My chauffeur
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3grenade. "I'm also a munitions whiz." Slim puffed away at the Havana Special as he rotated the Venus statuette on the mantle. The secret chamber was stocked with a wide variety of
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0what the commotion was about on her large screen HDTV. Smoke billowed from the White House as a frantic CNN reporter fell to his knees and began screaming. His head exploded when
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5heart from beating for love of God and Country!" The bus driver calmly grasped the taser from her belt and applied a jolt to my midsection. The last thing I heard was the siren...
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1the Dept of Homeland Security to report my hallucination, demanding that they send a drone to investigate. But rather than pilot the unit to the sacred WTC site, they instead
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5The Buddha thought for a moment, smiled, and then replied, "Maybe. But maybe not." The audience broke into laughter and applause as the infuriated moderator stormed off the stage.
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3limited to Italian dishes. Exotic cuisine from Armenia to Zaire was treated to the same violence. William S. Burroughs lowered his shotgun, aiming for a good ole American plate of
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4-- a little too big. In his zeal, he had not only devoured the banana in its entirety but also the better portion of my cybernetic forearm. Sparks flew from the exposed wires, and
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5Then, overwhelmed by a mood swing (to which he was prone), Death cleared the chessboard with a violent swipe of his scythe. "Enough of this game!" He reached into his pocket and
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3Zed raised the Crystal of Knowledge, a gem the size of his fist, into the light. As he admired its scintillations, Arthur Frayn warned him: "That one don't go in the forehead."
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4"Nah," he replied, "that's over there." He pointed towards the adjacent studio building. Standing by the door, Drew Carey was smoking a cigarette despondently. Mrs. Mrgradle crept
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4parently worn off. He was filled with rage, unable to believe the dismal truth. So I slugged him. We brawled for 40 minutes before I prevailed. I forced another pair of sunglasses
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5I had no life, at least in part due to my being an unapologetic cheapskate. Then they opened a Discount Life Mart off of the freeway just a few miles down. This was exactly the
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3bosom, I was torn...it disgusted me, but she was delicious..I just had to snort the ashes...and lick the tar from her lower bosom...this war would never end...not for I, Bardamu...
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4But he had excellent hair, and the women couldn't resist him. The kind of guy you just hate, total sociopath who always gets the chicks. Johnny Foreigner, a lead guitarist to boot,
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4"Rough day," I responded. "Lucy pulled the football away again!" Al laughed as he set the shot and beer before me. "She's been doing that for damn near 60 years, Charlie Brown!"