Finished Folds (181—200)
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5spleen, which was hanging by a thread of tissue due to an apparent gunshot wound. "Mmm...my sp...spleeeen...is enthusiastic." Mr. T groaned & turned away.He'd never forget...never.
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7l the Tru-Green man showed up, spraying his weed killer all over her. Miranda's inner flowers then bloomed & she ran away from the monastery with the Tru-Green man & lived happily.
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4. Oh, really? Obviously that study was done by women, so shut the hell up and gimme another beer. GO SAINTS! (in the background: "Wha Wha Wha Wha Wha Wha...")
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6music faded into nothingness. Then there was the light...and the famed stairway to heaven. But I couldn't climb them. Why? Because I am a Fred Astaires.
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4But it was Jerry Garcia who appeared instead. He was grateful...and so was the audience.
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6the shipment of Dunkin' Donuts which were later devoured by the cops. And you wonder why cops are such assholes? That's why.
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2you all thought was DEAD!!! The audience gasped in horror as TED whipped off his rubbery mask to reveal his ghastly skeleton face.
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4turned off the water and sniffed. "It's you. It's definitely you." Nick was offended. "He who smelt it dealt it!" he cried & swacked Derek with his towel. Nick's butt welt glowed
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7The nuns gasped in horror. Titters rolled across the pews. The altar boy spilled the communion chalice. Father O'Kief had no defense, no explanation. "'Tis a miracle!" he cried.
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7I didn't break my promise.Still, eyebrows were raised & rumors began circulating when my executive assistant & I arrived late to the boardroom, with toilet paper stuck in our hair.
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2Andy Warhol enjoyed getting hammered and then nailed. The drill at The Factory was different every time. There was music. Poetry. Lights. Cameras. Canvases. The giant hammers swung
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5In the recesses of my mind, I could hear another beckoning, calling me, then ANGER! "What the hell are you DOING?!" the voice screamed. "You're cheating on me with YOURSELF?!!! I'm
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5that he realized that. I approached him timidly. "What do you want here?" I asked, my eyes cast downward on my paper. "The right answer, of course." my professor answered, winking.
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8some vermouth & bitters. La-la-la, tra-la, deedle-diddy-day!" A pleasant lilting tune it was, whimsical to match his mood. A crowd began to gather. Someone pulled out an accordian
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3Oy! The smell! It was sour, warm & vomity all at once, assaulting his senses as he lay beneath the pile of mewling pussies. "This is all your own damn fault!" I reminded him. "You
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2with your soul? Maybe He wants to test your spirit." "My ass," Joseph thought to himself. "I heard that." The Holy Spirit replied. Stunned, Joseph turned to Mary & said, "OK. I'll
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8she was deported. But until then, he'd stir the pot a little more & also invite her hot Polish-Somalian friend along on their date. He loved cooking & going around the world.
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3. It was a hook. Literally. And as soon as you are finished reading the next sentence, the hook will pop out of the story and pull you inside. You are now hanging on a meat hook.
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3I heard her cold laughter from a distance, echoing from a place unknown. I spun around. A small mauve, yellow, & pink hand stamped & embellished note said it all: REVENGED. Martha.
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5Ernesto, her cousin who had only 1 ball. Ernesto had an unfortunate accident with a pitchfork as a lad. Ernesto also had only 1 eye, 1 arm, and 1 leg. He compensated by