Finished Folds (221—240)
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4was complicated by the fact that our dog loved me, but hated him. "Shuddup, you ugly mutt!" he cried, throwing 1 of his shoes at Spotty. Spotty bared his teeth & lunged at my ex
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6nodded at the same time I mouthed the question, "Larry Bird?" I couldn't let this happen. Larry Bird was my hero when I was a kid & now he was suffering. Zoe tried to stop me, but
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4hair was none other than Smegma, the most disgusting of all infestations. Ms. Horowitz screamed & ran into the restroom, clawing at her beehive & crying. Smegma snickered & hopped
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5for wimpy weenies. I know this from first hand experience, so to speak. Dora had a way with impotence that could only be described as miraculous. Once, she talked my penis into
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4"Twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what the hell I'm doing here." I muttered, right before I leaned over & kissed her instead. She sighed & snuggled up close. Love stinks.
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5parakeet poo, which lent the beverage a decidedly tropical zest. The Grandes Pezones was where anyone who was anyone in Bolivia hung out. I, Arturo Manchana ChaCha, got drunk there
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6"Mursh mothfa eggilittle, eh?" Ozzy Osborne replied. "I have no idea what you just said," the voice replied testily. "Singa leetle widme, go un!" "Me?You want ME to sing with you?"
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5hen he was suddenly aware that Lily was standing right behind him, her arms crossed,tapping her cockroach-killer pointy-toed shoes."No, Lily! NO! Don't do it! DON'T!" But Lily did.
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6... "Oh SH*T!" he jumped up, grabbed his stuff & ran out the door before Kim K could stop him. It was TUESDAY, not Monday...dammit! His presentation! He burst into the board room
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5Jealousy. That's what I saw in Seth's eyes. Even when we were kids, he'd throw tantrums if he didn't win. "Look, Seth. Monopoly...it's just a game. We're adults now & I..." Seth
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2the giant pirana-infested Amazon waters. I was about to sli---aaahhhh!!!! I snapped my fingers right before I fell into their jaws & FLUMPH...found myself cuddled up beside Wanda.
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3Billy shut the book. What a horrible story. "I ain't comin' to the liberry no more!" he thought. Billy went home then, sat behind his mom's computer & played Candy Crush forever.
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2So, you see, things don't change that much over time. History repeats itself. What was then is the same today and there's not a damn thing any of us can do about it.
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6Still, I was out on stage now & the America's Got Talent judges were looking at me expectantly. I had to perform. Something welled up in me and I let 'er rip, my sock puppets
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3Before I could answer, Bob's spastic arms knocked me over a table & my face plowed right into the ample bosom of this German Amazon woman. The 400 shots of peach schnapps splattere
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4pie plate was stuck to the back of my head or why my hair and eyebrows were singed off. Also, I was wearing clothes I'd never seen before. Women's clothes. I sniffed my armpits.
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5a stand-up sadist routine. Man! What was I gonna do for money now? I already tried being a mercenary, worked for a while as a part-time executioner, even served as a suicide bomber
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4was topless. Why I didn't notice that before when she was standing right here at my table taking my order, I'll never know. All I was thinking about then was waffles. Her nametag
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5You don't know Jack Squat.
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4, when lo & behold, Winnie-the-Pooh came floating by under a big red balloon, trying his best to reach my honey. It worked! Winnie saved me & we skipped away into the100 Acre Wood.