Finished Folds (2501—2520)
-
1inking into a diabetic coma, he collapsed, covered in ancient seeds. His decomposing body was the ideal medium for the germination of Jurassic plants. His head sprouted huge ferns
-
4"So," howled Lord Satan, "what's iHell's USP?" "The shiny case," said Steve Jobs,"and an auto-correct which only recognises words used by known fascists like 'lamppost' &
-
5Why didn't the ginger guy blow himself up at the end of the first series of Homeland?
-
2to the Aggro Arms. Hammered, Malarky Shenanigans took against Cy. "Leave it!" yelled Testy Tomfoolery, "he's not wurf it!" Malarky swung, missed Cy & knocked lovely Testy into next
-
4. I know it survived the 5 year journey on the transportation hulk to Mars & my scrunchy opened a bar for hair ornaments & other accessories but it was shut down. The Fashion Pol
-
4stop wearing kinky felt Lithuanian boots and wear leather sandals as God intended! The citizens of Giggleshitz revolted en masse! Running through the streets hurling Baltic pastrie
-
6delivered a googly by unleashing his Heinkels, raking the Tobrukians with machine gun fire. So they retired for tea. This cricket match was all a bit much! Rommel was in to bat
-
3whip Tiffany's sausage out of her hand, chuck it to the dog, and substitute 2 huge kosher kolbasas, 1 in each hand. Tim smiled adoringly, his parents were happy, Tiffany was sated
-
5had problems with tripping over her habit, it was too long. Sister Mary employed a gang of gerbils to nibble at the hem to get a better length. The gerbils lived in her wimple and
-
3. Turned out I was all wrong, I was in Ditsy Pug Street. I missed the drop and was alone with Mossad on my tail. I had to shake them. I ducked into a tiny wig shop, pulled on a hug
-
3a man. He wasn't Prussian or Greek or Peruvian or a Dane. He wasn't Russian or French or Malawian or from Spain. He was an Englishman! He was aaan Eeenglishmaaaaaaaaaan!
-
4peeing into the elephant's foot umbrella container. I couldn't believe it - my pants were again round my ankles! There was a curse on Oldblock Manor. An ancient trouser curse. Who
-
4I hate a cutting comment. "If you can't say something nice then don't say anything at all," someone said, maybe my Mum. But she died after complaining to a psychotic waiter about
-
3On the metro his eyes met repeatedly gangnam style with a beautiful woman. It was love! She was a brahmin, he was untouchable. How could the lovers get it on & bang a gong in such
-
4He threw 'For Whom The Bell Tolls' onto the fire and gathered his Beanie Babies into his trembling arms. "Don't ever leave," he whispered, "Every Beanie Babe lost diminishes me
-
5. I slaughtered goats, chewed their skins to soften them and stretched them over a frame of sticks to make a coracle. I launched myself from Acapulco Beach to go where the wind
-
6There was a mole deep in the Folding Story diaspora. S/he/It would copy folds and paste them in the 'How not to do it' sections of creative writing websites. Detective J Manatee
-
6My mastery of improv meant that I could declaim "Do you want fries with that?" with such depth, such conviction that my hotdog stand drew audiences of several dozen each evening
-
6yo' ass. Ahem. This takes me back to the time that photo of me, the donkey and Mr Whitby from number 35 reached googlical proportions. We were cyber-everywhere. I decided to break
-
2achieving a 'paperless office' by eating all the cheesy paperwork meant that my secretary and I expanded. Attempting to exit my office, we got fatally stuck together in the doorway