Finished Folds (2901—2920)
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7Pat only communicated with her lover in French, translated from overwrought English via babel fish. Her lover was getting fed up. What did 'I presse your passion softness' mean?
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1earlobe holes. I surfed ebay and found some hot Nicuaraguan Betty Mines cheap. It was collection only so I bought a one way ticket on a junk sailing to Managua on the next tide.
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4between the various organs in her abdomen. Why wasn't her appendix speaking to her spleen? Her left kidney - sulking for years. And talk about bitter ovaries. Her OB-GYN pursed her
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6his dreams for his 40 year sleep. Clown Bozo strode out of his house, his flares flapping and drove to see his girlfriend. He had to right that wrong, but was he 40 years too late?
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4interplanetary orbit. He soared and dipped in the shimmering ether. His heart battered in his chest when the moons of Saturn and Jupiter waved and cheered to see his radiant glory.
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3cheese-loving harridan from number 87. So I filled my hat with mice, their pockmarks stuffed with cheese. The mice were drowsy with Old Madeira to stifle their sniffly squeaks and
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2Angie and asked,"your list, what are the ratings for?" "It's a logarithm," mumbled Angie,"giving different weightings for freshness, juiciness and ripeness." He'd be eatable at 6pm
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6"Don't leave me in Hell without you," whispered Hades to Persephone. "I want to see the sun," she said. The torches of blue gentians flared blue in the darkness.
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7Carol stared at the bags of frozen peas, wondering where her life had gone. Gerard Butler sidled up to her in the freezer section naked, except for a green tartan kilt. "I love you
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6rat catcher to the queen. Another, gas lighter. Another computer programmer. Weird career choices indeed. Bunny couldn't choose, so sent her CV to all 3. Next week, a letter ploppe
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1"Jerry!" I hollered,"I've asked you time and time again to stop wearing my stuff!" My husband fingered the ripped fishnets guiltily."Just get your own frocks and lipstick!" I added
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6Europa, dazzled by the beauty of the white bull, let it lick her hand. Then tipping its horns the bull (aka Zeus) rolled her onto its back and plunged into the ocean towards Asia.
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3I also hated sauerkraut, weisswurst, the Godawful Blue Danube and Nazis. Perhaps my 3 year exchange to Munich University was a mistake? I also hate speaking German. Oh yes, and
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4years of intensive therapy couldn't erase that moment. She buried her Dad in an unmarked grave, burnt all his possessions, changed her name and blew up his house. Morocco-bound she
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5Phil Collins raging with coler, polished his bald pate, and angled it towards the noonday sun. Valery, in the path of the burning rays, combusted. He then played a 25 minute solo
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5sitting of parliament. Parliamentarians in speedos and flippers made a grizzly sight. Tony Blair, grinning like a loon told everyone not to panic. I packed a small satchel and ran
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10He was right to worry. Anger coursing through his veins, Joe shrieked like a gibbon and oxidised pretty much everyone he knew. Looked like being an oak was a distant dream - perhap
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1themselves with all manner of furry creatures. Injun Joe wrought peace amongst all creature kind. Last Monday he was flattened by a no. 230 bus and since then blood has run in the
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1so I closed my eyes and pretended no one could see me. My panic attack subsided. I was fine and dandy until searing pain bloomed in my jaw.
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7Wordlessly, the barber strapped me down, grabbed my topknot and, squirting on peroxide, massaged the solution in with rusty tongs. The flame thrower sped up the seasoning process