Finished Folds (1—20)

• 1
  Silence then tried to get back up to his feet, but he was just too drunk, so he shouted for help. "Now there's a representative that doesn't live up to his name," mused Senator

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  2011-09-19 23:58:33

• 4
  show the handsome but angry man in the mirror that he could never out-angry me. I am Bill O'Reilly, after all. "Are you a communist? Or do you just hate America? I bet you

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  2011-09-19 23:55:18

• 1
  positions so that they couldn't actually shit up the country. Thank god.

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  2011-09-18 01:51:21

• 2
  did? Who is he to tell the bad guys that they can't seize Gotham? This is a free country. Stop harassing Mistah J, you big sack of bat shit! I stopped thinking to myself and

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  2011-09-18 01:47:59

• 5
  Domino's, they were closed. "But I'm a famous nursery rhyme character!" King Cole insisted. "Sorry Humpty, we're still closed," the pizza joint mockingly replied. Cole was so angry

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  2011-09-18 01:43:54

• 2
  Volcanic Eruption Zebras are going to go down the same path sooner or later, abusing their power over magma to extort the whole world. Our only hope will be to

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  2011-09-18 01:39:13

• 4
  was told it would hurt in sex education class. But she didn't even remember that. She didn't remember anything. All she could think about was getting back to the orgasmihole.

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  2011-09-18 01:35:36

• 4
  then again, if Big Aristotle could fit in a "Shaq Fu" Mega Drive cartridge, why not a tiny pizza box? He asked my friend if there was any pizza left over, but sadly

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  2011-09-14 04:11:56

• 3
  So I unplugged every electronic device in the house. If the devil made them all work unplugged, I might as well unplug them all and save on my power bill, right? The devil

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  2011-09-14 04:07:35

• 6
  The beer looked back up at Pablo. He knew it was true love. But he feared what the butterfly would think of their love. It was the most bigoted butterfly in the bar. If it knew

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  2011-09-14 04:05:07

• 5
  The pigeon ground the cheeto into mush with its teeth, and then the mush went down its esophagus and into its stomach. Later the pigeon would poop it. "Wow, this is exciting!"

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  2011-09-14 04:01:10

• 5
  a duel using only scissors. Te octogenarian lost, thus having to dress as a ballerina. Beginning to suspect that this was not a WWII documentary, I changed

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  2011-09-14 03:57:46

• 6
  Sharpen my crayons so sharp that they can impale kevlar, equip my secret army with crayolas of death, and take over the world! This plan couldn't possibly fail, unless

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  2011-09-12 17:47:54

• 0
  Él tomó la clase, y con un año de práctica y trabajo duro, hann talaði íslensku nógu vel til að taka þátt í samræðum við ömmu sína.

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  2011-09-12 17:40:12

• 3
  her that I have an Applebee's coupon that expires tomorrow. As I got my food, she called. "Help! My house is burning!" "Isn't that ironic? My steak is underdone!" She didn't

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  2011-09-12 17:33:33

• 2
  a crude illustration of buttocks on the back and Andy Griffith's face on the front. The two friends would spend every day pretending they were Mayberry's finest, with

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  2011-09-12 17:26:10

• 4
  back of my head for these supposed pegs, but I couldn't find a single one. Had they come out? And if so, why haven't I fallen apart already? These questions

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  2011-09-12 17:18:38

• 4
  thought. If I called him on faking but he really was a Nazi, I would shoot up to somewhere between single mothers and Poles on his shitlist. But if he was faking and I ignored it,

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  2011-09-11 17:20:46

• 2
  the Warsaw vice principal, known to take his anger of his fourteen ex-wives out on the poor schoolchildren. "Only I am Fantastic enough to teach this man a lesson," Robert proudly

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  2011-09-11 17:14:56

• 4
  cactus? Those prickly fuckers are filled with water! Just then, I had a flash of brilliance - the desert! There are cacti in the desert! This was my smartest plan yet. I made my

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  2011-09-11 17:10:06